Monday, June 27, 2016

Peace through Reflection

 In my last post I shared my struggle of watching Jacob drive.  And truthfully, Jacob is an amazing driver and so it really isn’t about his driving skills.  As I really thought about it and began to reflect upon my emotions which felt like they were in a negative downward spiral.  I think the moment represents how he has one foot in the nest and one foot out of the nest, and I am not ready to let go.  It was only yesterday, I gazed upon his sweet face for the first time as I marveled over how God had taken part of Troy and part of me and created this beautiful miracle. 

I wrestle with my emotions and feelings on how am I going to let my son go?  Part of me wants to hold on and drive him around until he is at least 30J!   I know he is not a boy anymore but a young man.  I have to let him go and in the process my heart breaks a little.  In the brokenness, Jesus sheds the light of His love and the truth fills my heart and mends it back together.

Jacob is carved into the hands of the One who created the universe and flung the stars into place.  I will continue to muddle through this process and as I do I will rest in the promises of the ONE who loves Jacob more than I can possibly imagine.   I will continue to hold onto my favorite bible verse, ‘My soul find rest in God alone.  Psalm 62:1

How do you deal with struggles?  I would love to hear your thoughts. 

Thursday, June 23, 2016

Just Breathe and pray!

Have you ever noticed how fast 65 mph feels when you are in the back seat of seat of a car, as your 14 year old son is getting ready to drive onto the interstate for the first time?   Your mind starts to race in a million different directions.  Fear and anxiety begin to wrap their tentacles around your heart and your mind and they begin to choke out all reasonable thoughts.  If you have watched the movie Inside Out, you can imagine my emotions have reached a DEFCON threat level.

I took a deep breath and I knew I needed to pray to calm my mind.  Help me Jesus, is all I could manage to say silently to myself.  I didn’t want my husband or sons to know I am on the verge of a mental breakdown.  I also did not want my son to think for one minute he could not handle driving on the interstate.   The issue was all in my mind.

Jesus came and quieted my thoughts with one of my favorite passages of scripture.   “I will never forget you, I have engraved you on the Palm of my hand. “ Isaiah 49: 15b-16a   I needed the picture in my mind of God holding Jacob and the car in the palm of his hand.  It filled me with peace.

Jacob is an excellent driver and ready to drive in challenging situations.  I am thankful and grateful to know he will never travel alone, even when we are not in the car with him.

As a Mom have you gone through this already?  What helped you?  If you haven’t please know you have a tribe of women praying for you.  

The love this song, it is based on Isaiah.  It is beautiful and reflective.