Tuesday, April 04, 2006

“For I know the plans that I have for you”, declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and future.”

It was in the fall of my last year of college. I was really struggling with some major changes that were going on in my life. My twin sister had taken her first call as a Director of Christian Education eleven hours away from me and I was missing her terribly. I had also realized that the guy that I had loved for a long time would end up only being my friend. Even though I knew deep in my heart that it was for the best, I was devastated.

I poured my heart out to the Lord, and while I was crying out to Him, I started to write. The following is what I wrote during my time of prayer.

Dear Lord, my heart feels like it is breaking into a million pieces. I want to hold onto this chapter in my life. It hurts way too much to let it go."My dear child” said the Lord, "Unless you let go you will not have be able to grow. Your life is laid out as chapters in a book. In order to finish the book you have to finish each chapter and move on to the next. I know what is coming and I will never leave you or allow anything to happen to you, that you and I will not be able to handle together.

I still do not understand my Father, why it has to hurt so much? "My Beloved child, do you not understand that whenever you grow it can sometimes be as painful as the growing pains you experienced as an adolescent. Whenever changes take place it can be very painful. But in the end my precious one, you will come forth as pure as gold, because I will have molded you into the person that I have created you to be. In order to do this you must continue with the chapters of your life and at times experience growing pains. Always remember to trust in me and I shall make your paths straight."

Fast forward to the present time and I have a different perspective on what I felt all those years ago. Those feelings were very real, but I did not know back then how my life would change. My twin sister is now only 2 ½ hours away from me and we have shared many precious moments together.

I am married to my soul-mate. Troy is perfect for me. The chapters of my life have turned out better than I could have ever possibly imagined. I learned a long time ago that God always knows what is best; we just need to trust Him.

“Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all of your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:4-6

4 comments:

Mom and Dad said...

Hi Honey,

This was good and I'm sure people reading can relate to the way you felt back then. God always gives us the best for us when we put our trust in Him.

We love you very much.

Love always, Mom and Dad xoxo

Jen said...

Wow, this really rings true for me! I guess I needed that today. =)

troy said...

Hi Dear,

Well written!! continue the great work you have begun. I love you!! Troy

Betty said...

He only gives you one chapter at a time...some are short and some are long. Loved your chapter about your early life in college. Love, Betty