Ripples of Peace

2011-04-22T07:31:00.000-07:00

Last night as we were leaving our Maundy Thursday service, I looked over and I saw tears streaming down Jacob's face. I put my arm gently around him and pulled him close. As his Mom I know his tender heart and that he would need to share with me what was troubling him. He shared with me how much it bothered him that Jesus had to pay for his sins and the sins of world by dying on the Cross. I told him it wasn't fair but that I am so glad Jesus did not only consider what we deserved. Jesus knew the only option to save us, was for Him to take our place. We cannot save ourselves and the precious truth is we do have to anymore. Jesus has already saved us. It is done. It is finished.

Today we remember that Jesus died on the cross for our sins. Sometimes I think we say that phrase without remembering what it really means. The word crucifixion comes from the word “excruciating.” To be crucified is the most horrific and painful death a person can suffer. We can only begin to imagine the physical pain that Jesus suffered. Jesus also suffered spiritually and emotionally in a way that we never will. When He cried out, “My God, My God why have you forsaken me?” it was because at that moment, Jesus was separated from God. Now how could Jesus, who is also God, be separated from God? That has always been a great mystery – even to the greatest of theologians... He, who was without sin, became sin for us all and suffered separation from God. That is the only way we could be saved. Jesus knew what would happen and yet the night before He told His Father, “Not my will, but your will.” Our sins nailed Him to the cross, but His amazing love for you and for me held Him there.

If we would have been standing there that day we would have also heard Jesus say, “It is finished.” Jesus did not only say this, He shouted it out. “It is finished,” is three words in English; but in Greek it is one “Tetelestai” as it would be in Aramaic. And “Tetelestai” is the victor’s shout; it is the cry of a person who has won through the struggle; it is the cry of a person who has come out of the dark into the glory of light, and who has grasped the crown. So, then, Jesus died a victor with a shout of triumph on His lips.

“Here is the precious thing. Jesus passed through the uttermost abyss, and then the light broke. If we, too, cling to God even there seems to be no God, desperately and invincibly clutching the remnants of our faith, quite certainly the dawn will break and we will win through. The victor is the person who refuses to believe that God has forgotten them, even when every fiber of their being feels they are forsaken. The victor is the person who will never let go of their faith, even when they feel that its last grounds are gone. The victor is the person who has been beaten to the depths and still holds on to God, for that is what Jesus did.” (William Barclay)

2011-03-14T20:08:00.000-07:00

Lent is a time for reflection. A time for us to remember why Jesus had to die on the cross. There are churches where they do not talk about sin; it makes people feel bad about themselves. It is an unpleasant topic. And so they preach about “feel good” topics instead and the people leave the church feeling good about themselves and about the message.

The church I attend practices confession and absolution every Sunday. We confess our sins together corporately and there is usually a time for silence when we can reflect upon our sins. When I was growing up we would say: Oh almighty God, merciful Father, I, a poor, miserable sinner, confess unto Thee all my sins and iniquities with which I have ever offended Thee and justly deserve Thy temporal and eternal punishment. But I am heartily sorry for them and sincerely repent of them, and I pray Thee for Thy boundless mercy and for the sake of the holy, innocent, bitter suffering and death of Thy beloved Son, Jesus Christ, to be merciful to me a poor sinful being. After the confession the Pastor announces our forgiveness through our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

We had a church member leave our congregation because she did not like to say she was a poor miserable sinner. She didn’t think she fit into that category. Now, I am going to say something and for some of you it may sound weird. I find comfort in knowing that I am a poor miserable sinner. No, I am not happy that I am a sinful being. But it is an explanation as to why I fall short, every moment of every day. I am a poor sinful being and I will mess up every day of my life. I will sin knowingly and unknowingly. I will try so hard not to sin and I will fail. I don’t have any grand elusions about myself and when I do it never works out the way I envision it will.

It is a lie straight from the pit of hell to tell someone that when you are a Christian you will not have problems with sin anymore. If that statement is true (which it is not) what would we need Jesus for? If something we can do on our own could save us…why would we need a Savior? There are so many people out there who are miserable because they cannot live the perfect life, no matter how hard they try, they fail. I KNOW I’m not perfect. God knows I’m not perfect. God knows that I could not save myself, no matter how much I wanted too. I do not need to save myself; Jesus saved me when He died for my sins. We should not treat sin lightly. I am not proud that I am a poor miserable sinner. But I find great comfort in knowing that God knows exactly how miserable I am and loves me anyways. I find solace in the knowledge, the blood of Jesus has redeemed me and because of Him I stand forgiven.

I love Psalm 139 and I would like to share it with you in two ways. One is right from scripture and the other is through a song. May you take the time to reflect upon the words. I know it is painful when we realize our sinfulness but it is not the end of the story. Jesus has paid the price for you and for me. We are washed clean in the blood of the Lamb.

1O LORD, you have searched me and known me! 2You know when I sit down and when I rise up;

you discern my thoughts from afar.

3You search out my path and my lying down

and are acquainted with all my ways.

4Even before a word is on my tongue,

behold, O LORD, you know it altogether.

5You hem me in, behind and before,

and lay your hand upon me.

6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;

it is high; I cannot attain it.

7 Where shall I go from your Spirit?

Or where shall I flee from your presence?

8 If I ascend to heaven, you are there!

If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there!

9If I take the wings of the morning

and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,

10even there your hand shall lead me,

and your right hand shall hold me.

11If I say, "Surely the darkness shall cover me,

and the light about me be night,"

12 even the darkness is not dark to you;

the night is bright as the day,

for darkness is as light with you.

13For you formed my inward parts;

you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.

14I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works;

my soul knows it very well.

15 My frame was not hidden from you,when I was being made in secret,

intricately woven in the depths of the earth.

16Your eyes saw my unformed substance;in your book were written, every one of them,

the days that were formed for me,

when as yet there was none of them.

17How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!

How vast is the sum of them!

18 If I would count them, they are more than the sand.

I awake, and I am still with you.

19Oh that you would slay the wicked, O God!

O men of blood, depart from me!

20They speak against you with malicious intent;

your enemies take your name in vain!

21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD?

2011-03-10T20:15:00.000-08:00

I have been absent from my blog for a very long time. I never meant to neglect it. Sometimes life takes an unexpected twist and you find yourself on a path you never planned to take. I have had several unexpected life upheavals take place and I will share bits and pieces of them in time. I have struggled with my health for over three years now. It is hard. I have lost all parathyroid function. My body no longer knows how to process calcium and vitamin D on its own. I take medication to help my body absorb the calcium. This very medication which keeps me from developing kidney stones depletes my body of magnesium and potassium. So I take those supplements. If my body does not receive enough of those vital nutrients my heart races. I feel like a science experiment as we find the proper dosages to keep my body working effectively.

My diagnoses is called hypoparathyroidism. There are days where I feel normal. There are days were I feel so exhausted it is an effort to complete the ordinary tasks of life. There are times when anxious thoughts rob me of precious sleep and there are moments when depression hangs like a dark cloud over my day. It is a challenge because there isn't a pattern to when I feel good and when I will struggle to get through the day. Thankfully I have more good days than bad.

In the midst of learning to deal with my health limitations it became necessary for me to have a hysterectomy. The surgery went fine but post surgery I lost a lot of blood. It took me a few months for my body to recover from the trauma it went through. In the midst of this we are building a home. It is exciting to build a new home but if you have ever traveled that road it can be very stressful.

My husband, Troy, has been a huge blessing through everything. We have learned to take one day at a time. God has brought us through all of the joys and sorrow of this past year. He has never left our side. We remain in His capable hands. We do not know what tomorrow might bring, but we know God holds all of our tomorrows. We have found comfort in God's word and received strength and nourishment in receiving the Lord's supper. God has provided loving family and friends who have loved us through it all. God has provided for all of our NEEDS every moment of every day.

During the season of Lent I am brought back to a memory from my childhood. At the close of every Lenten service our congregation sang, "Abide with Me." I love the words of this beautiful hymn.

I know each one of you have your struggles and have great burdens to bear as well. May you find comfort in knowing the Lord has you in His most capable hands. May God grant you peace, hope, and joy today and always.

2011-03-09T12:17:00.000-08:00

Ash Wednesday

In worship services around the world many will hear the words, “Remember: you are dust, and to dust you shall return.”
Let’s take a peak at Webster and a few of the definitions of dust.

1. The ground; the earth’s surface.

2. The substance to which something, as the dead human, is ultimately reduced by disintegration or decay; earthly remains

3. British

a. ashes, refuse

b. Junk

4. a low or humble condition

5. anything worthless

Why would anyone want to be referred to as dust? Why do we need to be reminded, we are worthless?
Is there anything we can do to make ourselves right? Is there anyway we can make ourselves clean again? Unfortunately, the answer is NO there is nothing we can do. There is nothing we have to do. Only the blood of Jesus can cleanse us and make us whole. Only Jesus can lift us up out of the ashes and refuse of sin, we cannot do this on our own.
On our Church body’s website it states: “This ancient act is a gesture of repentance and a powerful reminder about the meaning of the day. Ashes can symbolize dust-to dustness and remind worshippers of the need for cleansing, scrubbing and purifying. If they are applied during an act of kneeling, the very posture of defeat and submission expresses humility before God.”

In order to understand what God has done for us, we need to remember we are poor miserable sinners, who deserve death and eternal damnation. No one would ever want to suffer eternally separated from God, if they truly understood what that meant. And yet, Jesus knew in order to keep us from what we deserve and have earned a thousand times each day. He had to take our place. Jesus suffered in agony on the cross for you and for me. We know the word crucifixion comes from the word excruciating, because of how much pain it inflicts upon the person sentenced to die. Physically the pain would be too much for anyone to bear but the greater anguish for Jesus was that He became separated from God. Jesus experienced the torment of hell when God the Father turned away from His Son. We do not know and understand how it happened. The great theologians cannot fully explain this mystery to us.

So as we kneel at the altar, and we are reminded we are worthless refuse who deserve to suffer Hell. We can joyfully remember we have been scrubbed, cleansed, and purified by the precious blood of Jesus.

In closing, I was going to share selected verses from Romans chapter 8. But I decided to share all of it. It takes awhile to read it but it is worth every moment.

May God fill you with His peace as we begin our Lenten Journey.
Romans 8

Life in the Spirit

1There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. 2For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. 3For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, 4in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit. 5For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. 6For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace. 7For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God’s law; indeed, it cannot. 8Those who are in the flesh cannot please God.

9You, however, are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if in fact the Spirit of God dwells in you. Anyone who does not have the Spirit of Christ does not belong to him. 10But if Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness. 11If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you.

Heirs with Christ

12So then, brothers, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh. 13For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. 14For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. 15For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, "Abba! Father!" 16 The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, 17and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.

Future Glory

18For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. 19For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. 20For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope 21that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. 22For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. 23And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. 24For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? 25But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.

26Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. 27And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. 28And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. 29For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. 30And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified.

God’s Everlasting Love

31What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? 33Who shall bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. 34 Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died—more than that, who was raised— who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us. 35Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? 36As it is written,"For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered."

37No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

2010-04-12T08:04:00.001-07:00

Jacob gave this poem at a speech contest last week. He did a great job and we are very proud of him!

2010-04-03T18:10:00.000-07:00

Alleluia! Christ has Risen! He has Risen Indeed! The tomb is empty! Despite the plans of men, God did not fail; Jesus rose victoriously from the grave! Our lives have changed forever.

One of my favorite Easter memories is from the first Easter I spent in Peoria. Because I was involved in the worship service I was part of the processional. The processional Cross was covered with a black hood and the cross on the altar was covered in black as well from the “Good Friday” service. As we started to walk into the sanctuary you could hear the brass boldly and triumphantly playing and as we proceeded down the aisle the black was removed from both of the crosses. It was a representation of the veil of sin and death being removed forever. Jesus had gone to the Father on our behalf and now we too could come before God. It was one of those holy and sacred moments that I will remember forever.

A little later on in the service we were singing “I Know That My Redeemer Lives” and we were singing the fourth verse, “He lives, my kind, wise, heavenly friend; He lives and loves me to the end; He lives, and while He lives, I’ll sing; He lives, my Prophet, Priest, and King!” At that moment I looked up at the beautiful statue they have of Jesus on the altar- and for the very first time I noticed the nail scars on His hands. I could not finish the rest of the hymn because I was so overwhelmed with emotion. Jesus, the King of all creation, died for my sins. I put those nail scars on His hands. I knew that I had been redeemed by the precious blood of Jesus, even though I did nothing to deserve it. I couldn’t sing the words with my mouth, but I was singing them in my heart.

Can you imagine the joy that Mary felt on that first Easter morning when Jesus first said her name? That Joy is ours because Jesus is calling us by name. He is saying, “(your name) come and walk with me. I have won the victory over sin, death, and the devil for you; your life will never be the same. You will never have to be separated from your heavenly Father; I have made that sacrifice on your behalf. Come and discover all that I have to offer you, come and rest in the Joy, Hope, Love, and Peace that you can only find through me.”

“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16

Alleluia! Christ has Risen! He is Risen Indeed!

2010-04-02T06:34:00.000-07:00

Today we remember that Jesus died on the cross for our sins. Sometimes I think we say that phrase without remembering what it really means. The word crucifixion comes from the word “excruciating.” To be crucified is the most horrific and painful death a person can suffer. We can only begin to imagine the physical pain that Jesus suffered. Jesus also suffered spiritually and emotionally in a way that we never will. When He cried out, “My God, My God why have you forsaken me?” it was because at that moment, Jesus was separated from God. Now how could Jesus, who is also God, be separated from God? That has always been a great mystery – even to the greatest of theologians... He, who was without sin, became sin for us all and suffered separation from God. That is the only way we could be saved. Jesus knew what would happen and yet the night before He told His Father, “Not my will, but your will.” Our sins nailed Him to the cross, but His amazing love for you and for me held Him there.

If we would have been standing there that day we would have also heard Jesus say, “It is finished.” Jesus did not only say this, He shouted it out. “It is finished,” is three words in English; but in Greek it is one “Tetelestai” as it would be in Aramaic. And “Tetelestai” is the victor’s shout; it is the cry of a person who has won through the struggle; it is the cry of a person who has come out of the dark into the glory of light, and who has grasped the crown. So, then, Jesus died a victor with a shout of triumph on His lips.

“Here is the precious thing. Jesus passed through the uttermost abyss, and then the light broke. If we, too, cling to God even there seems to be no God, desperately and invincibly clutching the remnants of our faith, quite certainly the dawn will break and we will win through. The victor is the person who refuses to believe that God has forgotten them, even when every fiber of their being feels they are forsaken. The victor is the person who will never let go of their faith, even when they feel that its last grounds are gone. The victor is the person who has been beaten to the depths and still holds on to God, for that is what Jesus did.” (William Barclay)

2010-02-24T14:38:00.000-08:00

Do you know how much God loves you? Can you comprehend the love He has for you? Can you even begin to fathom how His love can transform you and how it will have an eternal impact upon your life?

Do you know beyond a shadow of a doubt where you will spend eternity? Are you thinking, I hope to be in heaven?

I know where I will spend eternity, and that is with my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. You might think, wow, she is full of herself. What makes her think she is so special that she knows she is going to heaven. My dear readers, I cannot assure my salvation anymore than you can. But I know the ONE who can. I know Jesus, and my salvation is dependent upon Him. I cannot take credit for where I will spend eternity. I didn't earn it. I don't deserve it. I cannot buy it. I cannot even imagine or fathom how wonderful it will be.

All I know is someday this earthly body will take it's last breath and I will close my eyes one final time here on earth and the next time I open my eyes it will be to look upon the face of my Savior.

It is not about what I have done or what I am going to do. It is about what Jesus did for you and for me on the Cross. When Jesus cried out, IT IS FINISHED, it meant the separation between God and His people had ended. It meant the debt has been paid in full. We could never fulfill the debt, no matter how much we want to, we are unable to. God the Father knew we could never make the payment and so He sent His one and only Son to pay the debt for us.

Last week I shared scripture from Romans Chapter 8 and I am going to share some of those verses again. I know too many people who have questions about whether they will be in heaven or not. It breaks my heart when I think of them not being assured of their salvation. And although they might not ever express it to me, I think they might feel I'm arrogant in my absolute certainty of where I'm going when I die.

In Romans 8:1 It states, "There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus." We are poor miserable sinners each and every day. But Jesus paid all penalties for us. There is nothing we can do to save ourselves. To think we as mere humans could do anything at all to save ourselves is arrogant.

We can live consumed with the guilt of our sin wondering if we will ever be good enough to enter the gates of heaven. The truth is we are not good enough...but in Jesus we have been made clean. Based upon His work for us on the Cross we are saved. There is NO CONDEMNATION for those who are in Christ Jesus.

At the end of Chapter 8 we hear this blessed promise: "37No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord."

I hope you will take the time to allow THE WORD to soak into your heart and your soul. Your salvation does not depend upon you or your actions.

2010-02-23T07:42:00.000-08:00

On Saturday I attended the funeral of ,Pastor Freudenburg. It was a celebration of his life but more importantly we were reminded of the One who gave us life. The service was beautiful, in fact, I felt as though I caught a glimpse of heaven. The music and singing were magnificent.

I would like to share with you, Shepherd Me O God, by Marty Haugen.

Refrain

Shepherd me, O God,

beyond my wants,

beyond my fears,

from death into life.

1. God is my shepherd,

so nothing shall I want,

I rest in the meadows

of faithfulness and love,

I walk by the quiet waters of peace.

2. Gently you raise me

and heal my weary soul,

you lead me by pathways

of righteousness and truth,

my spirit shall sing

the music of your Name.

3. Though I should wander

the valley of death,

I fear no evil,

for you are at my side,

your rod and your staff,

my comfort and my hope.

4. You have set me a banquet of love

in the face of hatred,

crowning me with love

beyond my pow’r to hold.

5. Surely your kindness and mercy

follow me all the days of my life;

I will dwell in the house of my God

forevermore.

2010-02-17T11:59:00.000-08:00

Ash Wednesday

In worship services around the world many will hear the words, “Remember: you are dust, and to dust you shall return.”

Let’s take a peak at Webster and a few of the definitions of dust.

1. The ground; the earth’s surface.
2. The substance to which something, as the dead human, is ultimately reduced by
disintegration or decay; earthly remains
3. British
a. ashes, refuse
b. Junk
4. a low or humble condition
5. anything worthless

Why would anyone want to be referred to as dust? Why do we need to be reminded, we are worthless?

Is there anything we can do to make ourselves right? Is there anyway we can make ourselves clean again? Unfortunately, the answer is NO there is nothing we can do. There is nothing we have to do. Only the blood of Jesus can cleanse us and make us whole. Only Jesus can lift us up out of the ashes and refuse of sin, we cannot do this on our own.

On our Church body’s website it states: “This ancient act is a gesture of repentance and a powerful reminder about the meaning of the day. Ashes can symbolize dust-to dustness
and remind worshippers of the need for cleansing, scrubbing and purifying. If they are applied during an act of kneeling, the very posture of defeat and submission expresses humility before God.”

In order to understand what God has done for us, we need to remember we are poor miserable sinners, who deserve death and eternal damnation. No one would ever want to suffer eternally separated from God, if they truly understood what that meant. And yet, Jesus knew in order to keep us from what we deserve and have earned a thousand times each day. He had to take our place. Jesus suffered in agony on the cross for you and for me. We know the word crucifixion comes from the word excruciating, because of how much pain it inflicts upon the person sentenced to die. Physically the pain would be too much for anyone to bear but the greater anguish for Jesus was that He became separated from God. Jesus experienced the torment of hell when God the Father turned away from His Son. We do not know and understand how it happened. The great theologians cannot fully explain this mystery to us.

So as we kneel at the altar, and we are reminded we are worthless refuse who deserve to suffer Hell. We can joyfully remember we have been scrubbed, cleansed, and purified by the precious blood of Jesus.

In closing, I was going to share selected verses from Romans chapter 8. But I decided to share all of it. It takes awhile to read it but it is worth every moment.

May God fill you with His peace as we begin our Lenten Journey.

Romans 8
Life in the Spirit
1There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. 2For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. 3For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, 4in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit. 5For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. 6For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace. 7For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God’s law; indeed, it cannot. 8Those who are in the flesh cannot please God.
9You, however, are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if in fact the Spirit of God dwells in you. Anyone who does not have the Spirit of Christ does not belong to him. 10But if Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness. 11If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you.
Heirs with Christ
12So then, brothers, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh. 13For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. 14For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. 15For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, "Abba! Father!" 16 The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, 17and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.
Future Glory
18For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. 19For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. 20For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope 21that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. 22For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. 23And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. 24For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? 25But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.
26Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. 27And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. 28And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. 29For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. 30And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified.
God’s Everlasting Love
31What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? 33Who shall bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. 34 Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died—more than that, who was raised— who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us. 35Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? 36As it is written,

"For your sake we are being killed all the day long;
we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered."
37No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

2010-01-24T09:35:00.000-08:00

"Life is difficult." The opening line of the book, "The Road Less Traveled" by Scott M. Peck. It has been quite a few years since I read the book. I don't remember a lot from the book but the first words left an impression upon my mind.

I don't know about you but sometimes I grow so weary with life and it's challenges...it would be so easy just to pull the covers up over my head and go back to bed. Although sleep is good it won't solve most problems.

I've been struggling with my health issues for almost 2 1/2 years. It is frustrating because there are so many things I would like to do. I volunteer to help out with a project at church, school, or the community only to discover my health issues will not allow me to participate once again. Even now as I write this the tears I try to hold back spill down my cheeks. I know this is a season in my life and it will not last forever. There are so many people who deal with far greater health problems than me.

Death, depression, disease, family issues, money problems, lack of employment, fear of terrorism, and the list goes on. I see these issues amongst my family and friends and my heart breaks for them. Sometimes the words of comfort I try to offer do not seem to be enough... I can never offer enough to anyone but I know the One(Jesus)who has given His love so we can have enough grace to face each day and the difficulties it brings.

Yes, Life is difficult, we will never escape that truth this side of heaven. But thanks be to God we have a Lord and Savior who died on the cross for our sins. So that we do not have to live an eternity in despair and brokeness.

May you find comfort in the words of these beloved hymns!

"Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But He said to me, "My Grace is suffucient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, than, I am content with weakness, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:8-10

2010-01-05T17:37:00.000-08:00

Happy Twelfth Day of Christmas

I have been rather silent on my blog lately. I hope to share a couple of writings with you each week. My health issues continue to be a challenge at times but I am thankful to our loving Heavenly Father who sustains me and upholds me when I grow weary. I am grateful for a husband who loves me and gives me encouragement each day. He is a treasure and a gift from God to me. My boys bring me more joy than I ever imagined and so I am focusing on all that is good in my life.

Over the past couple of years I have included political commentary on my blog. I have decided to create a new blog which for my political thoughts.

My original intent for this blog was to share God's word and a place to share devotional style writings. It will be better to keep the political commentary separate from here. Over the next couple of weeks I will remove the politcal writings and links from my blog.

I would like to share with you my favorite Christmas Hymn. I will post the words underneath. May it bless you and remind you of the great love our Father has for you.

Of the Father’s love begotten, ere the worlds began to be,
He is Alpha and Omega, He the source, the ending He,
Of the things that are, that have been,
And that future years shall see, evermore and evermore!

At His Word the worlds were framèd; He commanded; it was done:
Heaven and earth and depths of ocean in their threefold order one;
All that grows beneath the shining
Of the moon and burning sun, evermore and evermore!

He is found in human fashion, death and sorrow here to know,
That the race of Adam’s children doomed by law to endless woe,
May not henceforth die and perish
In the dreadful gulf below, evermore and evermore!

O that birth forever blessèd, when the virgin, full of grace,
By the Holy Ghost conceiving, bare the Savior of our race;
And the Babe, the world’s Redeemer,
First revealed His sacred face, evermore and evermore!

This is He Whom seers in old time chanted of with one accord;
Whom the voices of the prophets promised in their faithful word;
Now He shines, the long expected,
Let creation praise its Lord, evermore and evermore!

O ye heights of heaven adore Him; angel hosts, His praises sing;
Powers, dominions, bow before Him, and extol our God and King!
Let no tongue on earth be silent,
Every voice in concert sing, evermore and evermore!

Righteous judge of souls departed, righteous King of them that live,
On the Father’s throne exalted none in might with Thee may strive;
Who at last in vengeance coming
Sinners from Thy face shalt drive, evermore and evermore!

Thee let old men, thee let young men, thee let boys in chorus sing;
Matrons, virgins, little maidens, with glad voices answering:
Let their guileless songs re-echo,
And the heart its music bring, evermore and evermore!

Christ, to Thee with God the Father, and, O Holy Ghost, to Thee,
Hymn and chant with high thanksgiving, and unwearied praises be:
Honor, glory, and dominion,
And eternal victory, evermore and evermore!

2009-11-05T17:44:00.000-08:00

Matthew calls this the "Sad Tree"! We had a fun late afternoon out at our beautiful church camp trying to capture some pictures of the boys together!

2009-10-05T10:32:00.000-07:00

Fireman Matthew is reminding all of our friends to make sure and check your smoke alarms!

2009-09-09T03:31:00.000-07:00

REMEMBERING 9/11

MAY WE NEVER FORGET

I know for many Americans as we approach the 8th Anniversary of 9/11 we are taken back in time to the day our world changed forever. We can recall with vivid detail where we were and what we were doing when we learned we had been attacked. Our minds will never forget the pictures of horror from that day and our hearts will always remember the heroes, and our thoughts and prayers will always be with those who lost loved ones.

I've volunteered to become part of Project 2,996 a day in which bloggers will remember those who died on 9/11. I was randomly assigned a name of a person who lost their life on that day. And so my post today is in honor and in memory of:

Steven Gregory Genovese

I never had the privilege of meeting Steven, but as I've captured a small glimpse of his life these past couple of days learning about him, I know he is someone I would have enjoyed having as a friend.

Steve was married to Shelly and they have a beautiful little girl, Jacquline. He was devoted to his family and took great delight in spending time with them. Those who knew Steve best said, "He lived life to the fullest, and did not want to take one second for granted."

On the morning of September 11, 2001 Steve was at work in his office which was on the 104th floor of the North Tower of the Word Trade Center, he was a partner and equity trader for Cantor Fitzgerald. His wife, Shelly, tells her account of what unfolded that morning and over the next few days, you can read about it here. You can find their story on page three of this document. I want for you to be able to read this story in her own words.

Steve worked at the WTC when it was attacked in 1993, he was able to walk away that time and his family had high hopes that this time it would be same story. Sadly this time, the story's ending is heartbreaking and their lives forever changed by this tragedy.

It is my fervant prayer that we will all take the time to stop and to pray for the family and friends who lost loved ones on September 11. I wish I could bring comfort and peace to each family as they remember their loved ones, I cannot humanly do that, but I know the One who can.

"My soul finds rest in God alone." Psalm 62:1

"Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the LORD, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior." Isaiah 43:1- 3

May God continue to bring comfort and peace to the Genovese family today and always.

2009-07-27T11:55:00.000-07:00

Jacob caught this 27 inch sturgeon on his B-day! They need to be bigger before you can keep them, so we had to throw it back.

2009-07-26T18:51:00.000-07:00

My Dad made this beautiful cross. It stands over 7 feet tall.

2009-07-22T17:27:00.000-07:00

2009-07-22T09:17:00.000-07:00

2009-07-22T09:16:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday Jacob! We are on vacation right now and so I will share this picture of Jacob's first canoe trip! I will have more pics to share later on.

A Mother never forgets the moment she first sees her child, Jacob captivated my heart from that very first moment. I love being his Mommy!

2009-07-21T17:48:00.000-07:00

Vacation wear's Matthew out! Must mean it is a good one!!!!

2009-06-15T20:28:00.001-07:00

2009-05-25T06:15:00.000-07:00

This writing is in memory and in honor of all of those men and women who have served our country and given the ultimate sacrifice defending our freedom.

Every man must die, but only a few really live. We cannot evade death because it will eventually come; but how we choose to live our lives makes a difference every day. How many of us have the courage to truly live. How many of us seize the day? Make the most out of every minute of our life; so that we can impact and make a difference in someone else’s life. I believe that our country was founded by people who had the courage to live. They believed with their whole being in liberty and justice for all. They had a dream and vision for what they wanted for our country. Patrick Henry stated it best when he said, “I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me liberty, or give me death”!

It was December of 1915; France, Britain, and Russia were struggling in their fight against the German Empire. A Canadian poet, John McCrae stood by as he watched the steady onward march of the enemy, and the almost hopeless heroism of his comrades to stay the German pressure. They were marching towards certain death and yet they courageously marched forward – fighting for their freedom and that of their countries. After watching this John, sat by the bedside of his dying friend, who had been wounded in battle; he then went on to write,

In Flanders Fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row.
That mark our place, and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing fly.
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the dead, short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow.
Love and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders Fields.

Take up your quarrel with the foe
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch be yours to hold it high.

If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep though poppies grow
In Flanders Fields.

Flanders Fields is now a U.S. Military cemetery in Belgium. Buried in this cemetery are the bodies of 368 members of the U.S. armed forces who died in WWI.

This poem is considered by many to be one of the most inspirational of it’s time. It was read from thousands of platforms in France and Britain to recruit more troops and to rally the spirits of existing troops. Once the U.S. decided to enter the war, the poem was read to encourage our troops as well.
When I look at the second verse…… “We are the dead, short days ago we lived…..” These men were willing to look death in the face and bravely they continued to march forward. They realized that they may not see their loved ones again here on earth and that their young lives would all too quickly end. That they might lose their ability to get up in the morning and thank God for another day. They died so that we might live another day in freedom.

Let us remember with honor today and every day all of the men and women that gave their lives for our country from Revolutionary War to the current war on terrorism. We have been given a precious gift to live in the land of the free and the home of the brave.

TAPS

Day is done,
gone the sun,
From the hills,
from the lake,
From the skies.
All is well,
safely rest,
God is nigh.

Go to sleep,
peaceful sleep,
May the soldier
or sailor,
God keep.
On the land
or the deep,
Safe in sleep.

Love, good night,
Must thou go,
When the day,
And the night
Need thee so?
All is well.
Speedeth all
To their rest.

Fades the light;
And afar
Goeth day,
And the stars
Shineth bright,
Fare thee well;
Day has gone,
Night is on.

Thanks and praise,
For our days,
‘Neath the sun,
Neath the stars,
‘Neath the sky,
As we go,
This we know,
God is nigh.

2009-05-03T13:45:00.000-07:00

Twenty eight years ago a young girl stood before her congregation to share her faith on her confirmation day. Around her family she was talkative and outspoken but in front of so many she felt timid and shy. As she prepared to talk she asked the Lord to give her strength and to share what she had written out.

Dear Pastor, family, friends, and fellow Christians:

My Confirmation verse is: “Commit thy way unto the Lord, trust also in Him and He shall bring it to pass.” Psalm 37:5. These words were written by an Old Testament poet, possibly King David. The Psalms were written for the Israelites and they were written to praise God much like what our hymns are used today.

My Bible verse reminds me of when we studied Luther’s Catechism, especially the Seventh Petition of the Lord’s Prayer. “But deliver us from evil.” What does this mean? We ask in this inclusive prayer that our Heavenly Father would save us from every evil to body and soul and at our last hour would mercifully take us to His Father in Heaven. This means that we should always trust God because He will always take care of us. This also means we are praying to escape evil, suffering, or pain, but to be set free from the power of the devil.

What my Confirmation verse means to me? I will always put my trust in God because I know He will always take care of me. Whenever I pray to God, I know He will always be there. He will always have time for me and for everyone else who comes to Him. I believe God will always protect me from evil and the power of the devil and when evil does come to me God will take care of it. He will keep it from destroying my faith if I believe and trust in Him. It means that I have committed myself to the Lord and that I should help other people trust in Him.

What being Confirmed means to me? It means becoming a member of St. Paul Lutheran Church and that when I’m a member, I will be able to take Communion. I will be able to help teach God’s Word and to continue coming to church every Sunday even when I’m Confirmed.

I would like to thank my Mom, Dad, and Pastor for helping me through Confirmation.

Today we celebrated Confirmation at Grace. Troy and I had the privilege of teaching the 8th graders Sunday School this year. We were blessed in our opportunity to share our faith to teach God's word.

As we sat there, I couldn't help but remember my own confirmation day 28 years ago today. I remembered when I was in 8th grade and had studied Luther's Catechism and all that it had meant to me. I thought I knew a lot...I know now I had only begin to scratch the surface...there is so much more to learn and to understand.

We also celebrated Good Shepherds Sunday in our church year today, how appropriate for Confirmation Sunday. Many of the hymns moved me to tears...not in an emotional frenzy sort of way...but a realization of all the ways the Lord has walked with me. In a world, which at times, seems to have "gone mad", I trust the Lord above all things. The following are the words of one of the hymns we sang today: Savior, Like a Shepherd Lead Us, I pray the words of this beloved hymn will bless you as much as the blessed me today.

1. Savior, like a shepherd lead us,
much we need thy tender care;
in thy pleasant pastures feed us,
for our use thy folds prepare.
Blessed Jesus, blessed Jesus!
Thou hast bought us, thine we are.
Blessed Jesus, blessed Jesus!
Thou hast bought us, thine we are.

2. We are thine, thou dost befriend us,
be the guardian of our way;
keep thy flock, from sin defend us,
seek us when we go astray.
Blessed Jesus, blessed Jesus!
Hear, O hear us when we pray.
Blessed Jesus, blessed Jesus!
Hear, O hear us when we pray.

3. Thou hast promised to receive us,
poor and sinful though we be;
thou hast mercy to relieve us,
grace to cleanse and power to free.
Blessed Jesus, blessed Jesus!
We will early turn to thee.
Blessed Jesus, blessed Jesus!
We will early turn to thee.

4. Early let us seek thy favor,
early let us do thy will;
blessed Lord and only Savior,
with thy love our bosoms fill.
Blessed Jesus, blessed Jesus!
Thou hast loved us, love us still.
Blessed Jesus, blessed Jesus!
Thou hast loved us, love us still.

2009-04-28T05:01:00.000-07:00

It has been awhile since I have posted. I have been struggling with my health issues and it has been enough for me to homeschool and take care of the daily things around the house. I do have a surgery date, May 14, and so I am very thankful to know it is just around the corner.

I've shared a little about what happened when my Dad was so sick a year ago. Yesterday, my Dad celebrated another Birthday, Happy Birthday Dad! As I reflect back upon a year ago and see how far my Dad has come, I recognize how God never left my Dad's side, not for one minute.

I was reading over the journal we kept for my Dad and I want to share a line or two from there with you. "My Dad is weak right now....but the One who loves him more than we can possibly imagine is always strong. Dad is relying on the Lord's strength now and for now that is enough."

I have always viewed my Dad as a very strong person and I mentioned how devestating it was for all of us to see him so weak and helpless after surgery. In thinking about all that has happened and about my Dad, I realized my Dad's strength has always come from the Lord.

Our strength as we sat with my Dad and waited until his body was strong enough to come out of sedation came from the Lord. Even though, I lived each moment of what happened, as I look back, I think how did we come through all of the trials? I know the Lord carried us through, and helped us deal with each moment as needed. He gave us His peace, which is beyond our human understanding. I truly believe God cushioned us with His love by allowing our minds to not to become stuck in the horror of what was going on. We were able to focus on God and His promises. We know we could have never done these things on our own.

One of the Bible verses I shared in our journal was taken from Psalm 27, it had always been a favorite of mine, but I read it in the King James version. "14 Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD."

I've lived long enough to know we all face struggles in our daily lives. My prayer for each of you is that you will know God's peace. And realize you are never alone, you do not need to rely upon your own strength, He gives and provides all you need for each and every moment.

I've share this Psalm before but I have found a clip on youtube I think you will enjoy it.

2009-04-15T07:55:00.000-07:00

Five Minutes

Last week I shared with you about my Dad’s heart attack over a year ago and how we almost lost him.

Before our Dad was able to go into heart surgery, he had another heart attack. They were unable to stop the attack and so they rushed him into emergency surgery. The surgery went well and everything appeared to be right on track. Jimella and I were not at the hospital but at home waiting beside our phones for updates from our Mom, Sheila or David. Throughout the day the reports kept getting worse instead of better. Our younger sister has a friend who is a doctor and she was able to view Dad’s reports, she told Sheila; tell your sisters too come. They need to be here.

Thanks to our dear friends, Melisa and David, they agreed to watch the boys for us while I was gone. Troy had just started a new job and had to leave for work at 4:00 a.m. each morning. I don’t know if they will ever realize the magnitude of the gift they gave so I could be with my parents and my siblings.

Jimella and I had a nine hour car trip before us. (It was a year ago today.) We decided not to talk about the severity of our Dad’s health and the “what if’s”. We needed to be alert for driving and not bawling our eyes out. Jimella, I have a confession to make. Even though we didn’t talk about it, my mind was spinning like a hamster wheel with thoughts I could not have voiced even if we had agreed to talk about it. My biggest fear was we would not make it in time to hospital, and Dad would die before we got there. I prayed I could tell Dad one more time that I loved him; it didn’t matter if he was in an induced coma, I had to be able to say it. I had to see my, Dad, one more time. To hold his hand, to pray, to encourage him, please just one more time, God…was the whisper of my heart.

We kept in contact with our Mom by cell-phone on the long trip north. There was no change in Dad’s health. Critical but stable.

We arrived at the hospital in hopes we could see Dad right away. But they had just gone into see Dad and so we had to wait another hour before we could see him. Only three could go in at a time and for only five minutes.

It was better for us to visit with Mom, Sheila, and David before we saw Dad for the first time. They were able to prepare us (sort of) and to remind us, not to let tears fill our voices or Dad to hear concern. Even though Dad was sedated his blood pressure would go up a little each time someone would talk to him.

You know five minutes can seem like eternity when you are waiting for a phone call or for something life changing to happen. But when you have been waiting to see your Dad and you don’t know if he is going to make it or not…five minutes flies by faster than you ever thought possible.

I had prayed all day long for this moment, that the Lord will help me to be strong for my Dad, my Mom, and for my siblings. I know Jesus carried me into my Dad’s ICU room. There was nothing anyone could have said to truly prepare me for the moment I would look upon my Dad’s face. I wanted to run from the room as fast as I could get out of there, I was hoping it was just a bad dream, and that it really wasn’t my Dad lying there so sick. God was holding all of us in His loving arms as we gazed upon our Dad, the one we have always known as healthy and strong. The Lord gave me the presence of mind to stay calm and the right words to say. “My soul finds rest in God alone.” Psalm 62:1 kept playing through my mind. I shared those words with my Dad; they were just as much for him as they were for me. Before I knew it was time for us to leave again. As we left the ICU the tears I had held back for so long came, I didn’t know if I could or even wanted to stop crying. But I knew I needed to pull myself together to be strong for my Mom. I could hear my Dad’s voice in my head; you need to take care of your Mom. For as hard as it was on all of us kids, I knew it had to be the most difficult for, Mom. To watch your husband, best friend, and the love of your life so sick…I couldn’t imagine.

I will share some more over my next couple of writings of some of what happened while we waited to see if my Dad would make it or not.

I have some questions for you. Are you ready for your five minutes? You never know what might happen in your life or those you love? Can you prepare yourself for those minutes? Please don’t fill your heart with worry over what may or may not happen. But there is nothing in life that surprises God. He knows what each day will hold in store for us. He doesn’t plan the bad things to happen, He knows because he is all-knowing. My parents taught me to trust God in all things…and as I have said before…they just didn’t teach us this lesson, they lived it. I learned I could trust God with every aspect of my life and you know He has never let me down.

I have been through situations so difficult; I didn’t know I could ever manage to get through it. But I knew God would walk with me and never leave my side. I knew somehow I would make it to the other side. I can’t take credit for my faith because it is the Holy Spirit working in me that helps me to trust and believe.

I pray you can find perfect peace in the “five minutes” of your life. You can only find it in the One who gave His life for you, our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

2009-04-12T19:44:00.001-07:00

2009-04-11T06:31:00.000-07:00

As I was reading this passage, I was once again amazed by these verses: “On the next day, which is the day after the Preparation, the chief priests and Pharisees came to Pilate in a body. “Sir,” they said, “we remember that, while He was still alive, that deceiver (Jesus) said, ‘After three days I will rise again.’ Give orders, therefore, that the tomb should be kept secure until the three days are ended, in case His disciples come and steal him and say to the people, ‘He has been raised from among the dead.’ If that happens, the final deception will be worse than the first.” Pilate said, “Take a guard, and make it secure as you can.” They went and secured the tomb by setting a seal upon it as well as placing a guard.” Matthew 27:62-66

The irony of all of this is that the Pharisees, who had so many times accused Jesus of breaking the Jewish law, of nothing is to be done on the Sabbath. They themselves, in an effort to make sure that Jesus’ body could never be removed from His tomb, broke one of their sacred laws. This only goes to show the lengths they were willing to take to make sure that Jesus would not cause anymore problems for them.

I wonder: Do you think they were remembering how Jesus had raised people from the dead? Do you think they were maybe a little fearful after they had heard Jesus’ final cry on the cross? Do you suppose this was their feeble human attempt to stop God from fulfilling His plan?

We know the ending of this beloved story. We know that there is not a tomb in the world that could hold the risen, victorious Christ. Their scheming and planning could not hold Him in the grave. We know that anybody who seeks to put limits on Jesus Christ is on a hopeless mission.

2009-04-10T04:22:00.001-07:00

Today we remember that Jesus died on the cross for our sins. Sometimes I think we say that phrase without remembering what it really means. The word crucifixion comes from the word “excruciating.” To be crucified is the most horrific and painful death a person can suffer. We can only begin to imagine the physical pain that Jesus suffered. Jesus also suffered spiritually and emotionally in a way that we never will. When He cried out, “My God, My God why have you forsaken me?” it was because at that moment, Jesus was separated from God. Now how could Jesus, who is also God, be separated from God? That has always been a great mystery – even to the greatest of theologians... He, who was without sin, became sin for us all and suffered separation from God. That is the only way we could be saved. Jesus knew what would happen and yet the night before He told His Father, “Not my will, but your will.” Our sins nailed Him to the cross, but His amazing love for you and for me held Him there.

If we would have been standing there that day we would have also heard Jesus say, “It is finished.” Jesus did not only say this, He shouted it out. “It is finished,” is three words in English; but in Greek it is one “Tetelestai” as it would be in Aramaic. And “Tetelestai” is the victor’s shout; it is the cry of a person who has won through the struggle; it is the cry of a person who has come out of the dark into the glory of light, and who has grasped the crown. So, then, Jesus died a victor with a shout of triumph on His lips.

“Here is the precious thing. Jesus passed through the uttermost abyss, and then the light broke. If we, too, cling to God even there seems to be no God, desperately and invincibly clutching the remnants of our faith, quite certainly the dawn will break and we will win through. The victor is the person who refuses to believe that God has forgotten them, even when every fiber of their being feels they are forsaken. The victor is the person who will never lot go of their faith, even when they feel that its last grounds are gone. The victor is the person who has been beaten to the depths and still hold on to God, for that is what Jesus did.” (William Barclay)

This video has a lot of pictures...could be a little distracting. I found myself closing my eyes and just listening to the words.

2009-04-08T18:56:00.000-07:00

Maundy Thursday

“Jesus went out as usual to the Mount of Olives, and his disciples followed Him. On reaching the place, He said to them, ‘Pray that you will not fall into temptation.’ He withdrew about a stone’s throw beyond them, knelt down and prayed, ‘Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will but yours be done.’ An angel from heaven appeared to Him and strengthened him. And being in anguish, He prayed more earnestly, and His sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground. When He rose from prayer and went back to the disciples, He found them asleep, exhausted from sorrow. ‘Why are you sleeping?’ He asked them. ‘Get up and pray so that you will not fall into temptation.’” Luke 22:39-46

Did you notice in the beginning of this scripture passage that it says, “Jesus went out as usual to the Mount of Olives?” I was curious about that and so I looked at my footnotes and it said to look at Luke 21:37 “Each day Jesus was teaching at the temple and each evening He went out to spend the night on the Mount of Olives.” Every night starting with the Triumphal Entry to the night in which Jesus was betrayed, He went out to pray.

Jesus was preparing Himself for the “Battle of all- time” that would change history and our lives forever. He made himself ready by praying and spending time with His Father. Jesus knew what He had to do and He was struggling with it and so He would pour out His heart to His Father.

We cannot even begin to imagine what Jesus went through that night, but I would venture to guess we have all wrestled in understanding God’s will for our lives. Have you ever struggled with something until you are completely worn out?

A year ago, it was a day like any other day. I went through my day taking care of the boys and getting ready for a Doctor's appointment. After I finished my appointment I stopped at the store for a few things...and they had a new kind of chocolate treat. I thought, it would be a nice suprise to leave in the car for Troy.

As I drove home, I called my parents. I knew they were going to spend the day with my Grandma but I had expected them to be home..but they were not. As I walked in the door the boys ran to greet me with hugs and kisses and I continued into the house to find Troy to give him a hug. When I looked into his eyes I could see he was deeply troubled and I knew something was wrong. He hugged me close and told me that my Dad was being taken by ambulance to Duluth as he had experienced chest pains. I felt as if the room was spinning and at the same time my breath was being sucked from me. I went into our bedroom and started to cry. Jacob and Matthew were immediately in there wanting to know what was wrong, why was I so sad. We told them Grandpa Jim was sick and he was going to the hospital to get things checked out. I pulled myself together for the sake of the boys and we sat on our bed and prayed for Grandpa Jim.

My Dad was in an ambulance and it would take five hours to get to Duluth from where he was at. During that time we did not have any contact with the ambulance team, in the rush cell-phone numbers were not given. My Mom and my brother were in route and their cell-phone did not have great service. I knew they would call when they arrived in Duluth and had a report on Dad. For three hours I sat and waited. I prayed my Dad would live...I prayed for another opportunity to see him..to hear his voice...to laugh with him... I "if onlied" myself until I was a basket case. Finally, I asked the Lord to give me peace. I knew no matter what happened, my Dad was with the Lord. Whether he lived or he died he was with Him. There was nothing else I could do. I asked the Lord to prepare my heart and to give me strength for whatever the future held. I couldn't fix it, I couldn't control it, all I could do was trust in the One, whom my Dad and Mom had trusted all of their lives. My parents not only taught me the faith, they lived in faith. Jesus was the center of their lives and I leaned upon the lessons they had instilled in me at an early age.

My Dad made it to the hospital and I was able to talk to him on the phone the next morning. My Dad is still with us and I give thanks to God for his life every day.

God is with you in your darkest hours and He will never leave your side. We want the best possible outcome to our prayers and it is not wrong to ask. But there will be times when our answers feel like God was not listening and think perhaps He has abandoned us and we question His love for us. God listens and He loves you more than you can possibly imagine. I have had plenty of prayers where I have felt those things...but along lifes journey..I have learned to trust. Whatever happens the Lord will lead me and guide me and give me strenght for each moment. May God fill you with His perfect peace today and always.

2009-04-06T05:51:00.000-07:00

About 14 years ago at a Good Friday service we had the opportunity to come forward at our church and pound a nail into a huge wooden cross. As we were pounding the nail, we were to say, “Jesus, it was my sins that nailed you to the cross.”This was a new experience for all of us and many of us needed a little time to think about it. We didn’t want to be the only one going up to the front of the church.

Out of the corner of my eye I noticed our Pastor’s son moving towards the cross. He was in a wheelchair and when he got close enough he came down out of his wheel chair and crawled to the cross. I held my breathe in anticipation as I watched him get ready to pound his nail into the cross. As he raised the hammer and struck the first blow, it was a horrible sound that echoed through the sanctuary and pierced my heart. I felt distraught as the realization came home to me in a profound and meaningful way. My sins had nailed Jesus to the cross.My eyes became filled with tears as I hung my head in shame. I thought about how I didn’t know if I wanted to be the only one up there and yet I knew that if I was the only one on earth, Jesus would have died for my sins. I got up from my seat and walked to the front of the church. I could hardly see as the tears filled up my eyes and spilled down my cheeks. I didn’t care at that moment if anyone saw me; this was a sacred moment between my Savior and me. I stooped down to pick up the hammer and the nail; I could barely say the words because my throat was tight with grief. I didn’t want to pound that nail into the cross because I didn’t want to admit that my sins had nailed Jesus to the cross.I rose up and I somehow managed to walk back to my seat. I felt a sorrow so great that my heart hurt as it hung heavy with grief. I couldn’t help but think of the words from the hymn

Stricken, Smitten, and Afflicted:
“Ye who think of sin but lightly
Nor suppose the evil great
Here may view its nature rightly,
Here its guilt may estimate.
Mark the Sacrifice appointed,
See who bears the awful load;
'Tis the Word, the Lord's Anointed,
Son of Man and Son of God.”

As I sat there in the silence and thinking about my sins, my heart began to fill with peace. I knew that Jesus loved me and had forgiven me. The fourth verse of the hymn brought even more comfort to me.

“Here we have a firm foundation,
Here the refuge of the lost;
Christ's the Rock of our salvation,
His the name of which we boast.
Lamb of God, for sinners wounded,
Sacrifice to cancel guilt!
None shall ever be confounded
Who on him their hope have built.”

2009-04-05T05:51:00.000-07:00

Today is Palm Sunday, the beginning of Holy week. “The disciples went out and did what Jesus had instructed of them. They brought the donkey and the colt and placed their cloaks on them, and Jesus sat on them. A very large crowd spread their cloaks on the road, while others cut branches from the trees and spread them on the road. The crowds that went ahead of him and those that followed shouted, ‘Hosanna to the son of David! Blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord! Hosanna, in the highest!’” Matthew 21:6-9 Have you ever wondered as to what the word “Hosanna” means? It is a shout of fervent and worshipful praise. It is a cry of praise or adoration to God. When they say Hosanna in the highest, it means let all who are in heave praise you as well.How could the very voices that are now raised in praise and adoration, become filled with hatred and cruelty on Friday when they shout “Crucify him”.

At the very same time that Jesus is making His triumphal entry into Jerusalem the Passover lambs were coming in through the sheep gate of the city. It is also interesting to note that all of the Passover lambs were born and raised in Bethlehem. The Lambs were being led into the city for the Passover Sacrifice. The “Lamb of God”, the perfect one was also being led in to Jerusalem and He would make the ultimate and final sacrifice for our sins.As we begin this Holy week, let us walk with Jesus the lonely road to Calvary. As we walk we will remember our Savior’s love for each one of us.

2009-03-31T20:09:00.000-07:00

I forgive you. How could three words, four syllables be so hard to say? I'm sure there are some who would tell me: You do not know the pain I have suffered, you cannot begin to fathom what they have done to me, I didn't deserve to be treated the way I was treated, they don't even care that they have hurt me, and the list goes on. How could I possibly know what you might say in your defense? Well, I'm sure I have thought the very same thoughts...my list is longer...and I'm sure yours could be too.

I struggle with forgiveness. It is especially hard to forgive someone when they never ask for it and they are not sorry for what they have done. Or when they continue to hurt you or the people you love. You are finally able to forgive and than another situation arises.

There are many instances I could share but I will go back over twenty years. I was on my internship and I was looking forward to my youngest brother graduating from highschool. I had talked to my Pastor at the beginning of my internship letting him know when it was and he told me that when the time came we would work it out.

My intership Pastor did not keep his promise and in fact he told me I would fail my internship if I went home for my brothers highschool graudation. My internship was a huge struggle and challenge...I worked with a Pastor who had a type A personality. I am the opposite. I tried to live up to his standards...and I never could. I made mistakes and I was not a perfect intern. But I did the best I could in the circumstances I found myself in. I loved the people at my church and if they would have known, what was going on...they would have been devestated.

It took me a long time to get over missing my brother's graduation. To this day when I see pictures, my eyes fill with tears.

I forgave the Pastor a long time ago. He never asked for my forgiveness and I'm sure he would tell you he made the right decision in not letting me go.

I learned a long time ago the only person you hurt when you do not forgive is yourself. You begin to sink into slimey pit of self-pity and you become stuck in the sin of your unforgiveness. God asks us to do the unthinkable from our point of view to forgive. God commands us to forgive as He has forgiven us.

We can become chained to our bitterness and anger. We get so caught up in what happened to us in the past...we miss the gifts of the present. We keep a list of the wrongs that have been done to us and it becomes so long we cannot even begin to carry the burden of it around with us anymore.

I believe God commands us to forgive for our own good. We have a lot of misconceptions about forgiveness.

I recently found an article in Focus on the Family on forgiveness. I would like to share it with you.

Forgiveness
Clearing up common misconceptions
by Laura Petherbridge
Angela knew she needed to forgive Leslie, but she didn't know how. After all, Leslie had betrayed their friendship by sharing conversations that were meant to stay private. But Angela knew that if she didn't get rid of her anger and forgive, the bitterness might consume her.
During more than 20 years as a speaker and teacher, I've encountered a vast number of people who are struggling to forgive someone. They understand the importance of forgiveness. But few have been taught how to do it. The cycle of bitterness and revenge continues often due to an inaccurate view of forgiveness. A number of resources explain what forgiveness is, but there is little that helps a person understand what it is not. And that is often the key.
1. Forgiveness is not a feeling.
If you are waiting until the feeling to forgive comes upon you, it's unlikely to occur. Forgiveness is an act of obedience to God, stemming from gratitude for His grace. And God knows that revenge, anger and rage can destroy us spiritually, emotionally and physically. Christ paid too much for His beloved ones to have them be slaves to anything, particularly hatred. He wants His children free. And a person is never free when weighed down with bitterness. When the cold shackles of revenge are tightly clasped around our wrists, it's impossible to lift our hands in praise to Him.
2. Forgiveness is not pretending you were not hurt.
Walking around with a painted-on smile when you are seething inside is not forgiveness. In Scripture we never see Jesus pretend. When He was sad, He cried (John 11:35). When He was angry, He turned over the tables in the temple (John 2:15-16). Someone has betrayed your trust, damaged your soul or caused a loss. It is OK to recognize and feel the hurt instigated by another's behavior.
3. Forgiveness is not condoning what the person did to you.
Many people hesitate to forgive because they feel as though the wrongdoer is getting away with the offense or that forgiveness will somehow condone the offender's choices. It doesn't. Instead, forgiving releases the wrongdoer from the debt she owes you and releases you from the bitterness.
4. Forgiveness is not trusting the offender.
After a betrayal, trust is not an automatic right of the offender. Forgiveness does not mean you immediately allow the person back into your life or heart. If someone is repentant and willing to work on restoring the relationship, you might be able to trust him again eventually. However, sometimes those who wound us shouldn't be trusted again. Though forgiveness should not be contingent on the perpetrator's repentance, a truly repentant person doesn't demand forgiveness or misuse Bible verses in an attempt to make you feel guilty. He humbly accepts complete responsibility for the sin and the consequences for his actions (Psalm 51), which may include giving you time to see evidence of his trustworthiness.
I have people in my life whom I have forgiven but I no longer trust because they have chosen to continue the same negative patterns that caused the offense or hurt in the first place.
5. Forgiveness is not relieving the person of responsibility.
A person shouldn't be "off the hook" from his or her responsibilities just because you choose to forgive. For example, a wife may be forgiven for placing the family in financial ruin with debt, but she should still be responsible for paying off the debt. A former husband may be forgiven for destroying his marriage with an affair, but he should still pay child support to his former wife.
Forgiveness doesn't eradicate responsibility. It's not unloving to hold someone accountable. Often accountability is the most loving thing you can do because it could lead to repentance.

Forgiveness — releasing resentment against one who has offended or hurt you — is rarely a one-time event. The pain doesn't necessarily disappear once you forgive someone. And those closest to us may hurt us repeatedly, requiring us to forgive multiple times.
The best way to step toward forgiveness is to admit that you need to forgive. Be honest with the Lord and ask Him to reveal any distorted thinking you may have about forgiveness. That often begins with discovering the difference between what forgiveness is — and what it is not.
This article first appeared in the November, 2008 issue of Focus on the Family magazine. Copyright © 2008 Laura Petherbridge. All rights reserved.
Laura Petherbridge speaks and writes on relationships, spiritual growth and divorce care around the world.

2009-03-28T09:06:00.000-07:00

The other night I was tucking Jacob and Matthew into bed. Usually, Matthew is all snuggly and full of hugs and kisses. His beautiful big blue eyes, which dance with mischief and fun, were filled with sadness and the beginning of tears. I pulled him close and asked him if he was okay. With his eyes turned down, he shrugged his tiny shoulders. I knew something was bothering him and so I just held him close. Finally, his little lips quivered and he said, “Mommy, I don’t want you to die.” I gave him a big kiss and told him, I don’t plan on dying anytime soon. By then both Jacob and Matthew had tears spilling down their cheeks. I asked Matthew, “Why do you think, I’m going to die.” He looked at me very seriously and said, “All of your vitamins are falling out of you.” It hit me that my perceptive little guy had heard me talking about my vitamin D levels being very low and that I needed to build them back up. He listens more than I realize and I should have explained things better to him and Jacob.

I pulled them both unto my lap and told them I wasn’t planning on dying anytime soon. I also wanted to be honest and I told them, none of us know when we are going to die. I told them, Jesus is always with us and He will take care of us. Whether, I’m here on earth with them or in heaven…Jesus never leaves us.

Jacob is my little worrywart, told me he still felt yucky on the inside and didn’t want me to be sick anymore. I told him worrying makes us feel sick on the inside and it doesn’t make things better. I told him we need to give our worries to God and let Him take care of things. Jacob wanted to pray about it and so the three of us bowed our head. I prayed first and than Jacob…after Jacob was finished he looked at Matthew and said, “It is your turn to pray.” Matthew looked at him and replied, “I not worried anymore, Jesus is going to take care of it. I’m sleepy.” Jacob told me he knew Jesus was going to take care of me, but he wanted to physically give him his worries. So, I told him to pretend his worries are in his heart, take them you out, and than fling them up to heaven. So, Jacob and I flung are worries up to heaven. I told him it was very important not to try and take the worries back, just to let God take care of them. He hugged me and assured me he felt much better.

I know I have wasted many precious moments worrying, stewing, and fretting over people, situations, and life in general. I have learned the hard way, it doesn’t fix anything, and you can never get those moments back. I have made myself sick with worry and I don’t want my boys to do the same.

How many times have you tried to fix the broken things in life? How many times have you replayed the images of a situation over and over again, in your mind, thinking if only I had done it differently? Have you ever tried to control anything and quickly discovered the only thing being controlled was you?

I am very concerned about my health…more about the impact that it could have upon my family. But I have discovered, I cannot fix anything, even my best attempts have failed miserably. I will continue to rest in the knowledge Jesus loves me and my family more than I can possibly imagine. He will walk with me as He always has and give me the peace and the strength to deal with whatever happens on a daily basis. “My soul finds rest in God alone.” Psalm 62:1

I have always loved the song, “Turn your eyes upon, Jesus”. I pray it will be a blessing to you and it will fill you with the peace that can only come from Jesus.

2009-03-25T18:24:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry I have not posted as much as I wanted too. It has become more difficult for me to find the time. With my illness it is challenging to do the things that I need to get done on a daily basis with my boys. Homeschooling comes first and trying to keep up with the daily task of keeping house. I'm posting something from Max Lucado. It is one my favorite pieces that I have received through his devotions he sends out. I want to do a few writings on forgiveness over the next couple of weeks. I thought this would be a good way to start it out. We often get caught up in holding grudges against people...and some times we might even have a good reason. But if you let it control your life...you are missing out on the joy of daily life. It is my prayer as you read this reading...that you do not think about how you really know someone who should read this...focus on yourself. Let God speak to you through this writing. We all have relationships we struggle with...we live in a broken and sinful world. May God continue to bless you on your Lenten Journey.

He Can Heal the Hurt
by Max Lucado

Grudge is one of those words that defines itself. Its very sound betrays its meaning.

Say it slowly: “Grr-uuuud-ge.”

It starts with a growl. “Grr …” Like a bear with bad breath coming out of hibernation or a mangy mongrel defending his bone in an alley. “Grrr …”

Remove a GR from the word grudge and replace it with SL and you have the junk that grudge bearers trudge through. Sludge. Black, thick, ankle-deep resentment that steals the bounce from the step. No joyful skips through the meadows. No healthy hikes up the mountain. Just day after day of walking into the storm, shoulders bent against the wind, and feet dragging through all the muck life has delivered.

Is this the way you are coping with your hurts? Are you allowing your hurts to turn into hates? If so, ask yourself: Is it working? Has your hatred done you any good? Has your resentment brought you any relief, any peace? Has it granted you any joy?

Let’s say you get even. Let’s say you get him back. Let’s say she gets what she deserves. Let’s say your fantasy of fury runs its ferocious course and you return all your pain with interest. Imagine yourself standing over the corpse of the one you have hated. Will you now be free?

The writer of the following letter thought she would be. She thought her revenge would bring release. But she learned otherwise.

I caught my husband making love to another woman. He swore it would never happen again. He begged me to forgive him, but I could not—would not. I was so bitter and so incapable of swallowing my pride that I could think of nothing but revenge. I was going to make him pay and pay dearly. I’d have my pound of flesh.

I filed for divorce, even though my children begged me not to.

Even after the divorce, my husband tried for two years to win me back. I refused to have anything to do with him. He had struck first; now I was striking back. All I wanted was to make him pay.

Finally he gave up and married a lovely young widow with a couple of small children. He began rebuilding his life—without me.

I see them occasionally, and he looks so happy. They all do. And here I am—a lonely, old, miserable woman who allowed her selfish pride and foolish stubbornness to ruin her life.

Unfaithfulness is wrong. Revenge is bad. But the worst part of all is that, without forgiveness, bitterness is all that is left.

The state of your heart dictates whether you harbor a grudge or give grace, seek self-pity or seek Christ, drink human misery or taste God’s mercy.

No wonder, then, the wise man begs, “Above all else, guard your heart.”

David’s prayer should be ours: “Create in me a pure heart, O God.”

From
The Applause of Heaven
© (Thomas Nelson Publishers, 1999) Max Lucado

2009-03-22T20:20:00.000-07:00

Do you ever long to have your life tied up into a neat and tidy package? Have any of you accomplished this feat? If you have, wanna share your secret?

Maybe my life is the only one that gets really messy and at times makes no earthly sense...although I have friends and we often compare notes...and they wish their lives were more orderly too.

Do you ever wonder if God could use your help? Or possibly you might have a better idea on how things might work out more to your advantage. You have a plan and you would rather it not include pain and suffering...and did I mention you would rather not deal with messy.

So many times in my life, I have thought I knew how things would work out for the best for me...and when they did not work out I was really disappointed...at first. But then I begin to realize God is always working through my life...He doesn't cause the upheaval, pain, or suffering...but He can bring good out of any situation.

God can take the broken pieces of our lives and bring healing in ways we could have never imagined.

Some of you may know I have been dealing with some health issues. I will eventually have surgery but it has been put on hold for awhile. I cannot even begin to tell you how discouraged I feel... You see my illness causes extreme exhaustion, depression, heart racing, and just a genuine overall feeling of living in a fog. Thankfully there are some good days...and I take advantage of those moments. I have two amazing reasons to get up of bed each morning....their sweet little faces...telling me good morning and greeting me with hugs and kisses. God has blessed me with an amazing husband who loves me through the ups and downs of our daily lives.

During this challenging time in my life God has surrounded me with His love through my family and friends. I have felt His peace and I know most days I move on the strength that He has given me. I often wish I didn't have to go through all of this....but never have a questioned God's love for me. I need to clarify, I don't think God caused me to be sick, but I know He can bring good out of it.

I don't pretend to understand all I can do is trust each day to the One who loves me more than I can comprehend. Jesus is with me in all of my moments...the good, the bad, and the very ugly.

As I reflect on all that God has done for me...this beautiful hymn comes to mind. I pray the words will minister to your heart and you will know God's peace today and always.

2009-03-18T20:31:00.000-07:00

2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

Olive Wyon, in her book Consider Him, quotes a story from the letters St. Francis of Sales. St. Francis has ntoiced a custom of the country districts in which he lived. He had often noticed a farm servant going across a framyard to draw water at the well; he also noticed that, before she lifted the brimming pail, the girl always put a piece of wood into it. One day he went out to the girl and asked her, "Why do you do that? " She looked surprised and answered, as if it were a matter of course, "Why? to keep the water from spilling...to keep it steady!" Writing to a friend later on, the bishop told this story and added: So when your heart is distressed and agitated, put the Cross into its centre to keep it steady!" In every time of storm and stress, the presence of Jesus and the love which flows from the Cross bring peace and serenity and calm.

As we walk the road to Calvary, with Jesus, during this Lenten season. Remember Jesus already walked this road before you. He carried all of your burdens, sorrows, sins, and pain. Let His peace, the peace that surpasses all human understanding fill your heart on mind today and always.

2009-03-16T20:05:00.000-07:00

Psalm 118
His Steadfast Love Endures Forever

1 Oh give thanks to the LORD, for he is good;
for his steadfast love endures forever!

2 Let Israel say,
"His steadfast love endures forever."
3 Let the house of Aaron say,
"His steadfast love endures forever."
4 Let those who fear the LORD say,
"His steadfast love endures forever."

5 Out of my distress I called on the LORD;
the LORD answered me and set me free.
6 The LORD is on my side; I will not fear.
What can man do to me?
7 The LORD is on my side as my helper;
I shall look in triumph on those who hate me.

8 It is better to take refuge in the LORD
than to trust in man.
9It is better to take refuge in the LORD
than to trust in princes.

10 All nations surrounded me;
in the name of the LORD I cut them off!
11They surrounded me, surrounded me on every side;
in the name of the LORD I cut them off!
12 They surrounded me like bees;
they went out like a fire among thorns;
in the name of the LORD I cut them off!
13I was pushed hard, so that I was falling,
but the LORD helped me.

14The LORD is my strength and my song;
he has become my salvation.
15Glad songs of salvation
are in the tents of the righteous:
"The right hand of the LORD does valiantly,
16the right hand of the LORD exalts,
the right hand of the LORD does valiantly!"

17 I shall not die, but I shall live,
and recount the deeds of the LORD.
18The LORD has disciplined me severely,
but he has not given me over to death.

19 Open to me the gates of righteousness,
that I may enter through them
and give thanks to the LORD.
20This is the gate of the LORD;
the righteous shall enter through it.
21I thank you that you have answered me
and have become my salvation.
22 The stone that the builders rejected
has become the cornerstone.
23This is the LORD’s doing;
it is marvelous in our eyes.
24This is the day that the LORD has made;
let us rejoice and be glad in it.

25Save us, we pray, O LORD!
O LORD, we pray, give us success!

26 Blessed is he who comes in the name of the LORD!
We bless you from the house of the LORD.
27The LORD is God,
and he has made his light to shine upon us.
Bind the festal sacrifice with cords,
up to the horns of the altar!

28You are my God, and I will give thanks to you;
you are my God; I will extol you.
29 Oh give thanks to the LORD, for he is good;
for his steadfast love endures forever!

2009-03-13T06:46:00.000-07:00

King David wrote Psalm 51 after he was confronted with all of his sins in regards to Bathsheeba: adultry, murder, lies, deception....

Psalm 51

Create in me a clean heart

1 Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your steadfast love;
according to your abundant mercy
blot out my transgressions.
2 Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity,
and cleanse me from my sin!

3 For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is ever before me.
4 Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight,
so that you may be justified in your words
and blameless in your judgment.
5Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity,
and in sin did my mother conceive me.
6Behold, you delight in truth in the inward being,
and you teach me wisdom in the secret heart.

7Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean;
wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
8Let me hear joy and gladness;
let the bones that you have broken rejoice.
9 Hide your face from my sins,
and blot out all my iniquities.
10 Create in me a clean heart, O God,
and renew a right spirit within me.
11 Cast me not away from your presence,
and take not your Holy Spirit from me.
12Restore to me the joy of your salvation,
and uphold me with a willing spirit.

13Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
and sinners will return to you.
14Deliver me from bloodguiltiness, O God,
O God of my salvation,
and my tongue will sing aloud of your righteousness.
15O Lord, open my lips,
and my mouth will declare your praise.
16 For you will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it;
you will not be pleased with a burnt offering.
17The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.

18 Do good to Zion in your good pleasure;
build up the walls of Jerusalem;
19then will you delight in right sacrifices,
in burnt offerings and whole burnt offerings;
then bulls will be offered on your altar.

2009-03-12T06:57:00.000-07:00

I gave up worry for Lent. For those who know me best, you will think, that didn't last long. The anxious thoughts have tried to creep in and capture my mind. I will be honest I've lapsed into moments were I've allowed my thoughts to race towards gloom and despair. And at those moments I begin to pray, sing, read God's word, or talk to Troy to help me sort through my thoughts.

I also want to try and fix things to make it better. I have quickly discovered there are many things I cannot fix: cancer, sickness, depression, gossip, broken families, lies told in order to destroy, sin, and the list goes on. I am a visual person and so during my prayers I envision myself placing all of my worries and problems into the Lords' hands. His hands are far more capable than mine. Than I rest in the knowledge He will work it out.

“Let you gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:5-7

2009-03-10T03:03:00.000-07:00

A lone tear escapes and trails down your cheek and soon afterwards another falls until they are like an army marching forward into battle. You are blinded by your grief and you are too weary to care anymore. You know the Lord walks with you but you are so tired and you are wondering why it has to be so hard. You close your eyes to pray and you are unable to form a coherent thought let alone express your deepest of sorrows. You wonder for a brief moment if you have lost your faith but you know God is there with you in the midst of your pain. You take comfort in knowing the Lord knows your heart and your thoughts. The Holy Spirit will intercede on your behalf when you are unable to pray.

You feel lighter like a great burden has been lifted from your shoulders. In the quiet of the moment you feel a sense of peace. Once again you are reminded you do not need to rely upon your own strength it was never enough, but the Lord will give what you need for each moment.

May you always know God's peace and comfort. I pray you will be renewed and refreshed by God's word today and always.

Psalm 42

1 As a deer pants for flowing streams,
so pants my soul for you, O God.
2 My soul thirsts for God,
for the living God.
When shall I come and appear before God? 3 My tears have been my food
day and night,
while they say to me all the day long,
"Where is your God?"
4These things I remember,
as I pour out my soul:
how I would go with the throng
and lead them in procession to the house of God
with glad shouts and songs of praise,
a multitude keeping festival.

5 Why are you cast down, O my soul,
and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,
my salvation 6and my God.

My soul is cast down within me;
therefore I remember you
from the land of Jordan and of Hermon,
from Mount Mizar.
7Deep calls to deep
at the roar of your waterfalls;
all your breakers and your waves
have gone over me.
8By day the LORD commands his steadfast love,
and at night his song is with me,
a prayer to the God of my life.
9I say to God, my rock:
"Why have you forgotten me?
Why do I go mourning
because of the oppression of the enemy?"
10As with a deadly wound in my bones,
my adversaries taunt me,
while they say to me all the day long,
"Where is your God?"

11 Why are you cast down, O my soul,
and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,
my salvation and my God.

2009-03-08T20:04:00.000-07:00

How often do you feel at peace? With yourself, others, God? Where are you looking for peace? Family, Friends, Food, Alcohol, Drugs? If you have chosen any of those how it working for you? I'm not asking you that question in judgement...I'm asking because I understand.

I haven't really tried the alcohol and drug option but I would imagine they would only provid temporary relief. I'm guessing because I often turn to chocolate to solve my problems. But I have quickly discovered my problems are still there and nothing has been solved. I love my family and friends and they have been there in countless ways to give encouragement and love to me. But they cannot provide me with true peace.

All of us face problems on a daily basis. I would like to focus on the sorrows in life to which no matter how hard you try they do not change.

A loved one suffering from cancer.
Health issues
Death
Being separated by distance from friends and loved ones
Abuse
Broken relationships, you have tried to repair them, but they remain broken
Finances
Job loss

I'm sure this list could be much longer. We each have our own crosses to bear. Please know that you are not alone. Jesus has given us grace and peace in abundance. Some you might be thinking, yes that is true, but how does that solve my problems. It may not solve your problems but we can find comfort in knowing the Lord walks with us and we are never alone.

May you find comfort in God's word.

1 Peter 1:2-9
May grace and peace be yours in abundance.
3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4 to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, 5 who by God’s power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. 6 In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, 7 so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. 8 Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, 9 obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls.

Wonderful, merciful Savior
Precious Redeemer and Friend
Who would have thought that a Lamb
Could rescue the souls of men
Oh you rescue the souls of men

Counselor, Comforter, Keeper
Spirit we long to embrace
You offer hope when our hearts have
Hopelessly lost the way
Oh, we hopelessly lost the way

You are the One that we praise
You are the One we adore
You give the healing and grace
Our hearts always hunger for
Oh, our hearts always hunger for

Almighty, infinite Father
Faithfully loving Your own
Here in our weakness You find us
Falling before Your throne
Oh, we're falling before Your throne

2009-03-06T05:50:00.000-08:00

I had hoped to be able to write a post for each day during Lent. But I have found I do not always have the time to write one for each day. So, I'm hoping to post at least 4 times a week. May God continue to bless each of you on your Lenten Journey.

2009-03-05T02:10:00.000-08:00

Come to the Quiet

Our lives are so busy and hectic. When is the last time you were able to "Be Still" before the Lord. To sit in the quiet and talk to Him, or better yet, let Him talk to you. I'm not asking you these questions to make you feel guilty. I'm extending you an invitation for these next few minutes to have some time of reflection and prayer. Just to sit and be in the presence of our Lord, who loves you more than you can possibly imagine.

Come and bring your troubles, your heartaches, disappointments, hurts, broken dreams and plans, and He will take your burdens from you and fill you with a peace which surpasses all human understanding.

During your time with Him you will have an opportunity to reflect upon Psalm 139 and to listen to two different pieces of Taize music. Taize is a special form of prayer and worship.

Psalm 139
Search Me, O God, and Know My Heart

To the choirmaster. A Psalm of David.
1O LORD, you have searched me and known me! 2You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar.3You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways.4Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O LORD, you know it altogether.5You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me.6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it.
7 Where shall I go from your Spirit? Or where shall I flee from your presence?8 If I ascend to heaven, you are there! If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there!9If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,10even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me.11If I say, "Surely the darkness shall cover me, and the light about me be night,"12 even the darkness is not dark to you; the night is bright as the day, for darkness is as light with you.
13For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.14I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.15 My frame was not hidden from you,when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth.16Your eyes saw my unformed substance;in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.
17How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them!18 If I would count them, they are more than the sand. I awake, and I am still with you.
19Oh that you would slay the wicked, O God! O men of blood, depart from me!20They speak against you with malicious intent; your enemies take your name in vain!21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD? And do I not loathe those who rise up against you?22I hate them with complete hatred; I count them my enemies.
23Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts!24And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!

2009-03-04T03:15:00.001-08:00

As a young girl my family would attend Lenten services. At the close of each service, the light would dim until only the cross in front of the church would be illuminated. We would stand and sing "Abide With Me". As the darkness would envelop our small church the familiar notes of the beloved hymn would fill the air and our voices would lift up in praise.

Abide means to remain constant and steadfast. My parents always taught us the Lord would always walk with us, not only in words but by the way they lived their lives. The words of the hymn further instilled this teaching.

I know there are times in life when the hurt we feel encompasses our daily life. It pushes out the peace and leaves us feeling empty and abandoned. When we get caught up in the storms of life we forget our Lord is right there in the midst of the suffering. He didn't cause the suffering, but He understands it. I pray you will find comfort and encouragment in God's word and in the hymn.

Psalm 27
The LORD Is My Light and My Salvation

1The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?The LORD is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?
2When evildoers assail me to eat up my flesh,my adversaries and foes, it is they who stumble and fall.
3 Though an army encamp against me, my heart shall not fear;though war arise against me, yet I will be confident.
4 One thing have I asked of the LORD, that will I seek after:that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life,to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to inquire in his temple.
5For he will hide me in his shelter in the day of trouble;he will conceal me under the cover of his tent; he will lift me high upon a rock.
6And now my head shall be lifted up above my enemies all around me,and I will offer in his tent sacrifices with shouts of joy;I will sing and make melody to the LORD.
7 Hear, O LORD, when I cry aloud; be gracious to me and answer me!8You have said, "Seek my face."My heart says to you, "Your face, LORD, do I seek." 9 Hide not your face from me.Turn not your servant away in anger, O you who have been my help.Cast me not off; forsake me not, O God of my salvation!10For my father and my mother have forsaken me, but the LORD will take me in.
11 Teach me your way, O LORD, and lead me on a level path because of my enemies.12 Give me not up to the will of my adversaries; for false witnesses have risen against me, and they breathe out violence.
13I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living!14 Wait for the LORD; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the LORD!

2009-03-03T06:08:00.000-08:00

My heart was trembling in agony and I was sobbing so hard that I could hardly talk. I was standing in the Minneapolis airport getting ready to say good-bye to my younger sister Sheila. It was the summer of 1993 and communism had recently fallen in Russia and my precious baby sister was flying over to Moscow to become a missionary. Even though Sheila is younger; her wisdom is far greater than mine. Sheila looked at me and told me that I needed to stop crying and pull myself together. She asked me what is the worst thing that could happen to me over in Moscow? I told her that she could die over there and than what would I do!

I will never forget her response to my fears. “Michelle, whether I live or I die, I will be with God. What more could you ask for?” I was humbled and I felt ashamed that I had not put my trust in God. I remembered the little pin that I was going to give Sheila as a farewell gift. It was a picture of God’s hand and resting in His palm was a young girl. It goes along with Scripture passage from Isaiah 49, “I will never forget you my people, I have carved you on the Palm of my hand. I will never forget you, I will not leave you orphaned, for you are my own. Would a mother forget her baby? Or a woman a child within her womb? Even if these forget I will not forget you because you are my own.” I had bought pins for myself and our other sister Jimella, to wear close to our hearts while Sheila was in Russia.

The time had come for our final hug and although the tears were streaming down my cheeks and dripping off the end of my nose; I felt a peace from deep within. It was not a peace that could come from me, it was the peace that passes all human understand, the peace that can only come from God. My heart ached as I knew it would be almost a year before we would see each other again; and this was long before e-mail and cheap phone rates. I was excited for Sheila and all of the people that I knew she would touch with God love and to be able to share His precious word with them.

Sheila had been in Moscow for a few months and it was the beginning of October. That week-end I decided to go home to visit my parents. That night we were watching the news we saw the horror that was happening in Moscow; they were in a midst of a Civil War. We sat there in shock and disbelief; and we watched the events unfold right before our very eyes. The phone begin to ring with family and friends calling from all around the world asking if we had heard from Sheila. We had no way of getting a hold of her and so all we could do was pray and ask others to do the same. After the phone had quieted I shared with my parents the talk that I had with Sheila at the airport. I had given my mom a little statue of a little girl carved in God’s hand. We talked about how we knew that Sheila was with God no matter what happened and that He was holding her close to Him right now. We found comfort that Sheila was living with a Russian family and she had quickly become their adopted daughter and they were very protective of her.

As I went to sleep that night I held onto to two thoughts: Sheila is with God and He has her in the Palm of His hand. I awoke many times and I could feel God’s peace surrounding me and I prayed that it would surround and enfold Sheila and also my parents.

The next morning the phone rang; I’m not a track star but I made record time in running down the steps to get to the phone, we knew it had to be about Sheila. Hearing her voice on the other end of the phone brought tears and hearts that were grateful to hear her beautiful voice. She said she knew she had to call because we would all be worried sick; she shared that while it was bad it was not as terrible as the news stations were sharing with us. Her Russian family had forbidden her to go out and would not do so until it was once again safe in the streets of Moscow.

It's hard to let go of our loved ones. I weep everytime I say goodbye to parents after visiting them, because deep in my heart I know I will never be ready to say a final good-bye to them here on earth. I know someday my boys will grow up and I will need to let them venture out on their own. It is a part of life.

I have the privilege of having friends all over the world and I long to have them all close by. I know the Lord holds them all in the palm of His hand.

Whenever I think about heaven one of the things I like to think about is how I will never have to say good-bye to anyone there. Because we will have all of eternity to spend together.

2009-03-02T05:11:00.000-08:00

Great is Thy Faithfulness

Over the past couple of months I have known people who have been involved in heart wrenching situations. Real-life nightmares that do not go away when they wake up...it just begans another day of wondering what will happen next.

I'm sure we all have experienced those moments which take your breath away. You begin to wonder how will I make it through the next hour, day, or week.

The Lord walks with us through each of these moments. I love this portion of scripture in Lamentations 3:19-24

19 Remember my affliction and my wanderings, the wormwood and the gall!

20My soul continually remembers it and is bowed down within me.

21But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope:
22 The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases;

his mercies never come to an end;

23they are new every morning;

great is your faithfulness.

24 "The LORD is my portion," says my soul,

"therefore I will hope in him."

2009-03-01T05:49:00.000-08:00

My Soul Finds Rest in God Alone

Today I would like to share with you my favorite Psalm. All of God's word brings me comfort and peace, but this Psalm is never far from my mind. When things in life are troubled or hard, I remember the words of finding rest in God alone.

I held onto this Psalm when I went into surgery six years ago not knowing if they would find cancer or not. When we discovered my beloved Grandmother had pancreatic cancer and there was nothing the doctors could do. I remember walking into the hospital room to tell her good-bye for the final time here on earth. How do you say goodbye to someone you love so much? How do you break away from the that final hug? How do you leave the room knowing this will be the last time your eyes will look upon the face who had always been there for you? How do you go in the room with grace and dignity and not cry hysterically? How do you let go when your heart is breaking into a million pieces? I was able to do this because the Lord walked with me..He gave me a peace and comfort I have never found in any other place.

There have been so many other times I have remembered the words and I will share some of them with you over the next few weeks.

May God fill your heart and mind with perfect peace today and always.

1For God alone my soul waits in silence; from him comes my salvation.2 He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be greatly shaken.
3How long will all of you attack a man to batter him, like a leaning wall, a tottering fence?4They only plan to thrust him down from his high position. They take pleasure in falsehood.They bless with their mouths, but inwardly they curse. Selah
5For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from him.6 He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken.7On God rests my salvation and my glory; my mighty rock, my refuge is God.
8 Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us. Selah
9 Those of low estate are but a breath; those of high estate are a delusion;in the balances they go up; they are together lighter than a breath.10Put no trust in extortion; set no vain hopes on robbery; if riches increase, set not your heart on them.
11 Once God has spoken; twice have I heard this:that power belongs to God, 12and that to you, O Lord, belongs steadfast love.For you will render to a man according to his work.

2009-02-28T08:34:00.000-08:00

Children of the Heavenly Father

As she walked into the room her joy grabbed at our hearts and her presence lit up the waiting room at the Doctor’s office. I heard her Daddy call her Alexis as she paraded by my chair. Her eyes sparkled with fun and mischief as she climbed up into her chair which was taller than her. As her brilliant blue eyes gazed around the room she invited a smile from who were waiting for their medical procedures.

Her Daddy was reading her the comics and after each line she would throw back her head and laugh with pure glee. This little ray of sunshine captivated my heart for those minutes we shared in the same waiting room and for the rest of the day. There were two distinct differences about this precious child, which you could not miss. The light in the room danced off her perfect little head and her tiny chest contained a port which at times allowed dangerous drugs to enter her system to kill off the deadly cancer cells in her little body.

Her parents eyes brimmed with deep love for their little girl, but you could see the lines of worry and weariness etched around their eyes.

As a parent, I could feel the icy claws of fear begin to grip my heart as I began to think about my children. How many of you have broken out into a cold sweat at the thought of watching your child suffer from a life-threatening disease? Have you ever bargained with God? Begging and pleading with Him to let you take the suffering and pain on your child’s behalf? Most parents would take the place of their sick child in an instant, and not give it a second thought.

Sadly, we do not get to choose who becomes sick in our families. God does not choose either; sickness is in our world because of sin.

God weeps with us in our moments of deepest sorrow. He offers us His peace and strength in the moments when we feel like we cannot breathe because the burden is so great. He carries us through the moments when we feel like cannot cope.

I do not know what is in store for my sons as they walk through this life. But I do know the Lord loves them even more than I do. I will cling to the promises of God’s word and entrust my family to His care.

Matthew 11: 28-30 “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."

2009-02-26T19:54:00.000-08:00

I am posting Friday's reflection tonight. I will be leaving early tomorrow morning for my appointment in Iowa City to see the specialist. I am a little nervous and anxious but I know the Lord goes with me. I would like to share with you my Grandmother Katherine's favorite Psalm. She prayed this Psalm everyday for her children and grandchildren. It brought her a lot of comfort. I have found encouragment and strength from the words of this Psalm many times and espcially as I think about my health issues.

Psalm 91
My Refuge and My Fortress

1He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will abide in the shadow of the Almighty.
2I will say to the LORD, "My refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust."

3For he will deliver you from the snare of the fowler
and from the deadly pestilence.
4He will cover you with his pinions,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness is a shield and buckler.
5 You will not fear the terror of the night,
nor the arrow that flies by day,
6nor the pestilence that stalks in darkness,
nor the destruction that wastes at noonday.

7A thousand may fall at your side,
ten thousand at your right hand,
but it will not come near you.
8You will only look with your eyes
and see the recompense of the wicked.

9Because you have made the LORD your dwelling place—
the Most High, who is my refuge—
10 no evil shall be allowed to befall you,
no plague come near your tent.

11 For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways.
12On their hands they will bear you up,
lest you strike your foot against a stone.
13You will tread on the lion and the adder;
the young lion and the serpent you will trample underfoot.

14"Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him;
I will protect him, because he knows my name.
15When he calls to me, I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble;
I will rescue him and honor him.
16With long life I will satisfy him
and show him my salvation."

2009-02-26T08:38:00.000-08:00

Troy and I have had the privilege of teaching Jr. and Sr. High kids in Sunday school and youth group over the years and we have learned a lot from them. There have been times in order to avoid studying the lesson they will ask questions. In one particular class they wanted to know about our confirmation classes and what did we learn. We have learned over the years to take the situation and turn it into a “teachable moment”.

I told them I remembered the very first question my Pastor asked in confirmation. They all laughed and told me it was so long ago, how could I ever remember J Of course they wanted to know the question. Our Pastor walked into the class and asked us if any of us thought we were good enough to go to heaven? If we did, we needed to raise our hand. No one raised their hand. The Pastor shocked us by saying you are right, none of you are good enough to go to heaven and you never will be. He had our attention.

Of course he went on to explain, heaven is not something we can earn for ourselves, but Jesus paid the price for our sins, so we can go to heaven.

Our class wanted to know what I had ever done to think I didn’t deserve to go to heaven when I was young. I shared with them, I knew I was a sinner, and I wasn’t good. I asked them, if they had ever felt remorseful over their sins? Sometimes was their answer.

I have noticed two extremes in the lives of Christians they are either so consumed with guilt they consider themselves unworthy; or they never stop to think about how they are living their lives because they know God will love them anyways.

In both cases they miss out on the joy of understanding God’s grace and forgiveness. I don’t know if you have experienced either extreme, I know I have.

Two Bible verses come to mind: Psalm 103:12 “as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.” As we repent and ask for forgiveness God removes our sins and remembers them no more.

Psalm 139: “23Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts!24And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!
Sometimes we do not see the sin in our lives, and this is a good Bible verse to reflect upon. Asking the Lord to show you how you might live differently.

Again, I want to emphasize there is nothing we can do to earn favor with God. Jesus has done it all for us. My prayer for you during this Lenten Journey is you will experience the joy of understanding the precious gift of Salvation God has given you and how much He loves you.

I have found listening to music a wonderful way to reflect. This is one of my favorite Hymns/songs during the Lenten Season.

2009-02-25T08:52:00.000-08:00

Ash Wednesday

How many of you really lived it up yesterday (Fat Tuesday) because you knew today started your Lenten journey? I have never understood the concept, I'm going to party like there is no tomorrow, because for the next 40 days of Lent I need to be really good.

I want to take a look at the comment, " I need to be really good" throughout this reflection today. Today along with other Christians from all over the world, I will observe Ash Wednesday by going to church. As part of the service, I will go forward and kneel at the altar. The Pastor will make a sign of the cross on my forehead and say, "Remember from dust you came and to dust you shall return."

I could get bogged down with the dust comment and for 40 days remind myself of how unworthy I am and that I do not deserve God's love. I could become depressed over the realization I can never be good enough. I would encourage you instead of just reflecting upon yourself, reflect upon what God has done for you.

I do think we need to realize we are poor miserable sinners and there is nothing we can do to earn God's favor. It's when we get to that point we realize we need a Savior, because we can not do it on our own.

In our Lenten Journey we remember, Jesus has all ready walked the road to calvary. He walked for you and for me. Our sins nailed Him to the cross. If you would have been the only person on earth, Jesus would have died on the cross, just for you.

Beneath the cross of dust on my forehead, is a permanent cross that was made at my baptism. I have been made a child of God forever. There is nothing I did to deserve it, God gave it to me as a gift, the gift of being His child forever. Through Him, I will have eternal life. It doesn't matter to me if my physical body returns to the dust, because my spiritual body, will be with Jesus forever.

Romans 8: 38-39 "For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord."

I would like to share with you one of my favorite songs, In Christ Alone. As you take the time to watch it may you be reminded of how much Jesus loves you. May God fill you with His perfect peace today and always.

In the opening scenes of this youtube clip. You will see Jesus drawing a line in the dust/sand. It is the story of the woman caught in adultery. You will see the men lined up to stone her....watch how she approaches Jesus and how He treats her.

Here are the words to this song if you are not familiar with it.

In Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
This Cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm
What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease
My Comforter, my All in All
Here in the love of Christ I stand

In Christ alone, who took on flesh
Fullness of God in helpless babe
This gift of love and righteousness
Scorned by the ones He came to save
'Till on that cross as Jesus died
The wrath of God was satisfied
For every sin on Him was laid
Here in the death of Christ I live

There in the ground His body lay
Light of the world by darkness slain
Then bursting forth in glorious Day
Up from the grave He rose again
And as He stands in victory
Sin's curse has lost it's grip on me
For I am His and He is mine
Bought with the precious blood of Christ

No guilt in life, no fear in death
This is the power of Christ in me
From life's first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny
No power of hell, no scheme of man
Can ever pluck me from His hand
'Till He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand

2009-02-15T20:19:00.000-08:00

I have seen this on several blogs. It is well worth the time to listen to the words of wisdom from one of our greatest Presidents, Ronald Wilson Reagan. I will never believe in the change Obama wants to bring to America. Socialism has always failed...I do not want to see the country I love go down this road.

2009-01-18T06:17:00.001-08:00

Sanctity of Human Life Sunday

My friend, Cheryl, had this posted on her blog this morning. I wanted to share it with my readers as well. Please take the time to watch. I'm still wiping the tears from my eyes over the beautiful song which is shared.

2008-12-24T09:38:00.000-08:00

Silent Night Holy Night

Christmas Eve was special for our family. Mom would make a simple but delicious dinner and our Grandma always joined us.

After we finished eating it was always a mad dash to get ready for Church. Our family loved the Candlelight Christmas Eve service because it was an opportunity to gather to worship the Christ Child and to remember the true meaning of Christmas.

I can remember sitting with my brother and sisters quietly in the pew and anticipate our favorite part of the service. We would almost hold our breath as we eagerly watched the lights become dim and we would squirm with joy as we saw the ushers go forward to light their candles from the Christ Candle. Finally, they would come down the center aisle and light the candle of the first person in each pew. Then each person would carefully light the candle to the person next to them until the whole church was bathed in candlelight. I would glance around and look at my church family and we all seemed to be in awe of this “Holy Moment” in time. It wasn’t Holy because of candlelight but because we were remembering how God sent His only son, the King of the Universe to born in a manger. Our voices would lift together in worship singing “Silent Night” and it was peaceful and sacred.

After the church service we would go home and we would open our presents. We did not have much money and so there were not many presents, but we always were thankful for what we received. Mom and Dad had instilled in us at an early age that Christmas was not about the presents under the tree. It was about God giving us the most precious gift of His son Jesus Christ.

My senior year of college was the year of my DCE internship at a church in southern Minnesota. My family lived 7 hours away. In preparing for church work I knew that I would not be able to spend Christmas with my family because that is a busy time for church worker and I would have many responsibilities. Knowing this and experiencing being away from your family on Christmas for the first time was difficult for me.

I remember talking to my Mom on the phone and feeling down. It was hard on my Mom too but she never let on because she didn’t want me to feel worse. I told her that I would miss going to church with them on Christmas Eve. Mom gently reminded me that we would all be worshipping the Christ child, just in different places.

I was delighted when I found out that my internship church had the same tradition of lighting candles for singing Silent Night. During the service, instead of feeling sorry for myself, I gave thanks to God for my family. I was filled with joy because even though we were not together physically, our hearts were connected by a bond of love that could never be broken.

Now 20 years later, my husband and I have the same tradition with our two young sons. It has been a long time since my family of origin have all been together at Christmastime. But we feel bonded together by the tradition my parents created for our family over 40 years ago. We are bound together in a moment that transcends human understanding. We are connected by the extraordinary love of family during the miraculous, magical moments of Christmas.

The video is not the best quality, but I love this Christmas song.

2008-12-24T07:28:00.000-08:00

I received this from my Mom this moring and I wanted to post it to my blog. The author is unknown, so I am not able to give credit. After you read it, I'm sure you will agree with me, the author is someone who doesn't write to receive accolades.

THE TRUE MEANING OF CHRISTMAS

It was the week before Christmas I had just finished the household chores for the night and was preparing to go to bed, when I heard a noise in the front of the house. I opened the door to the front room, and to my surprise, Santa himself stepped out from behind the Christmas tree. He placed his finger over his mouth so I would not cry out."What are you doing?" I started to ask.The words choked up in my throat, and I saw that he had tears in his eyes. His usual jolly manner was gone. Gone was the eager, boisterous soul we all know.He then answered me with a simple statement: "Teach the children!"I was puzzled, what did he mean?He anticipated my question, and with one quick movement brought forth a miniature toy bag from behind the tree. As I stood bewildered, Santa said, "Teach the children. Teach them the real meaning of Christmas. The meaning of Christmas that nowadays has been forgotten."Santa then reached in his bag and pulled out a fir tree and placed it before the mantle."Teach the children that the pure green color of the stately fir treeremains green all year round, depicting the everlasting hope of mankind. All the needles point heavenward, making it a symbol of man's thoughts turning toward heaven."He again reached into his bag and pulled out a brilliant star."Teach the children that the star was the heavenly sign of promises long ago. God promised a Savior for the world, and the star was the sign of the fulfillment of His promise."He then reached into his bag and pulled out a candle."Teach the children that the candle symbolizes that Christ is the light of the world, and when we see this great light, we are reminded of He who displaces the darkness."Once again he reached into his bag and removed a wreath and placed it on the tree."Teach the children that the wreath symbolizes the real nature of love Christ showed for us. Real love never ceases. Love is one continuous round of affection."He then pulled from his bag an ornament of himself."Teach the children that I, Santa Claus, symbolize the generosity and good will we feel during the month of December."He then brought out a holly leaf."Teach the children that the holly plant represents immortality. Itrepresents the crown of thorns worn by our Savior. The red holly berries represent the blood that He shed for us."Next he pulled from his bag a gift and said, "Teach the children that God so loved the world that whoever believes in Him shall have everlasting life." (John 3:16) Thanks be to God for His unspeakable gift. Teach the children that the wise men bowed before the Holy Babe and presented Him with gold, frankincense and myrrh. We should always give gifts in the same spirit of the wise men."Santa then reached in his bag and pulled out a candy cane and hung it on the tree."Teach the children that the candy cane represents the shepherd's crook. The crook on the staff helps to bring strayed sheep back to the flock. The candy cane is the symbol that we are our brother's keeper."He reached in again and pulled out an angel. "Teach the children that it was the angels that heralded the glorious news of the Savior's birth. The angels sang 'Glory to God in the highest and on earth peace to men of good will.'"Suddenly I heard a soft tinkling sound, and from his bag he pulled out a bell."Teach the children that as the lost sheep are found by the sound of the bell, it should bring mankind to the fold. The bell symbolizes guidance and return."Santa looked around and was pleased. He looked back at me and I saw that the twinkle was back in his eyes. He said, "Remember, teach the children the true meaning of Christmas and do not put me in the center for I am but a humble servant of the One that is, and I bow down to worship Him, Our Lord, Our God, and Savior."-- Author Unknown

2008-12-02T09:10:00.000-08:00

Rare Cosmic alignment of Jupiter and Venus show a smile in the night sky! A friend who lives in India sent me this picture of what they viewed in the night sky. I know it brightened their day as they have been devestated by the terrorists attack.

When I saw this picture, my first thought was, what an Awesome God we love and serve. What a gift.

2008-11-30T09:31:00.000-08:00

Not Forgotten

I'm at home today from Sunday School and Worship as Matthew is fighting off a cold and he has a fever. So, I have been sorting through Jacob and Matthews' clothes and organzing. It is safe to say it is not my favorite job. I decided to listen to our CD from the Watoto's Children Choir. They were at our church in the Fall of 2007 and I fell in love with them and their music. The following is one of my favorite songs from their CD. These children are orphans and yet they have the "Joy of the Lord". The first part is a little hard to understand but once the music starts you will be amazed at their talent. Turn up those speakers and dance along, I know you want too!

2008-11-30T06:48:00.000-08:00

White As Snow

This morning we woke up to a white sparkly blanket covering our yard. Everything looked fresh, new, and clean. I love the look of the first snow.

It reminds me of this song that we recently sang in church. It is based on Isaiah 1:18 "Come now, let us reason together,"says the LORD. "Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool."

We are but poor miserable sinners. There is nothing we can do save ourselves from our sin. Jesus did it all for us on the cross.

2008-11-28T09:29:00.000-08:00

Thankful and Grateful

I didn't have an opportunity to write this post before we left for our whirlwind Thanksgiving trip to visit Jimella and family.

As I reflect upon this past year I have so many things to be grateful for. I wish I had the time to write about all of them. I think I need to start writing more gratitude posts throughout the year.

First and foremost and I am thankful for my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. I do not have to face life's daily challenges as He walks with me and is my constant companion. To many times I want to fix or control things. I have discovered time after time this never works, maybe one of these days I will learn my lesson. I need to place it all in the capable hands of Jesus, and I cannot even do that on my own. He has already taken care of my biggest challenge by dying on the cross for my sins, and making my payment for me.

All of my blessings are gifts from the Lord and so I will try and list as many as I can, with some pictures!

I am truly blessed to be married to my soul-mate. Troy, is a wonderful husband and he is my best friend. We have been through a lot together, and God has walked with us each step of the way. We have had the privilege and the joy of raising our two sons Jacob and Matthew. Having boys around is always an adventure.

For those who know us best you know we have had some huge financial, health, and emotional challenges over the past couple of years. The Lord has provided for us in countless ways, all of our needs were met on a daily basis. For those who walked this journey with us, prayed for us, loved us, listened and cried with us, and for all of the other gifts you gave to us....Thank you from the bottom of our hearts. Even though we have experienced some dark moments, we felt and saw God's love through the heart of His people.

This past year we were able to farm our ground again. Even with late planting because of flooding and a very dry August, we were blessed with bountiful crops. I have learned as a farmer's wife there is always a time to plant and always a time to harvest...all of it guided and directed by the hand of the Lord.

We have decided to farm differently and so we have hired someone to help with the planting and harvesting, while Troy works full-time with a contract position at John Deere, which hopefully will soon become permanent. Troy has been able to help farm our ground with our boys when time allows. Mart, the guy we have working for us has been very kind to our boys and we appreciate it. Here are some pictures of my favorite farmers!!!! And of the harvest!!!!

Notice, Jacob, resting in the wheel of the tractor!

This last year as many of you know we almost lost my Dad. The four of us siblings were able to all be together with my, Mom as we waited for Dad to recover from his surgery. He was in ICU for a long time. We are thankful, Dad is still with us. I have been deeply blessed to have wonderful parents and siblings. It is a gift to be able enjoy a close relationship with all of them. I wanted to include some pictures from our time spent with them this summer.

Jacob & Matthew with Grandma and Grandpa with Willy the Walleye. Some of my favorite childhood memories are fishing for Walleye, on Lake of the Woods. Willy is stationed near Lake of the Woods and so we took advantage of a kodak moment!

My four favorite Dudes, enjoying a picnic lunch together! Don't they look cool in their shades?

Grandpa and Matthew on his first fishing adventure from boat! We didn't catch any keepers but we have some wonderful memories to enjoy.

2008-11-23T19:09:00.000-08:00

Prayer Request

Please pray for Zoe. She is a little baby girl who has lived 8 months longer than what anyone ever imagined. She has trisomy 18 and she will be having heart surgery on Tuesday. Please hold the family close in prayer. You can read more about this precious little girl and her family here. Your hearts will be touched by this amazing story and family. We have never met this family but we have prayed for Zoe since the day she was born.

May God fill this family with His perfect peace.

2008-11-22T17:38:00.000-08:00

May God bless all of our troops that served. May God grant peace to all the families who lost their loved ones. May God Bless the United States of America. May we never forget the price of freedom.

For more on VI day please go here.

2008-11-18T12:15:00.000-08:00

LIFE CHANGING DEVELOPMENT

It has been awhile since I have posted. I have been busy with a project I have been working on for over a year. It is one of those "life changing" moments. It will change some of my time, have a positive impact on our budget, and it is a milestone for a member of our family.

Only another Mommy or Daddy could truly understand this as a "big deal." A few of you have probably guessed as to "what in the world" is she talking about.

Have you guessed, yet? Are you curious? Or are you wishing, I would just hurry up and post about it all ready? LOL!

Matthew is officially potty-trained! WOOHOO, want to join me in my happy dance ;-)

For those of you who do not know, Matthew is almost 4-years-old! I have tried just about everything a Mother can do to accomplish this important detail in our life.

I was beginning to think I was a failure as a Mommy. I stay at home with my kids...I'm with them all of the time...why is this not happening. I tried everything from bribery to taking almost every important toy away from him. The only thing it accomplished, was him holding it in for way to long.

Many Mom's told me, relax, he will decide one day he want to be a big boy and it will happen. Easy to say when it is not your kid. And even though, I hoped they were right...I really didn't believe them. I was beginning to think it would never happen.

Well guess what?!!!!? Those other Moms, knew exactly what they were talking about. So, to all of those Mom's who hung in there with me, THANK YOU AND GOD BLESS YOU!!!

2008-11-11T06:56:00.000-08:00

Seven Weird Random Facts About Me

Paula at Amused Mama has tagged me for this fun and interesting MeMe.

• Link to the person who tagged you and post the rules in your post.
• Share seven random/weird facts about yourself.
• Tag seven random people and link to their blogs.
Let each person know they’ve been tagged by leaving a comment in their blog.

SEVEN RANDOM/WEIRD FACTS ABOUT MYSELF:

1. When I was 15 I fell off a hay wagon, and ended up in the hospital for 9 days. I missed a month of school. It took me almost 5 years before I could even sit on a haywagon again.

2. On one my many youth ministry adventures: We (the girls) were in a Finnish Sauna for about twenty minutes in our bathing suits. Than we put on our wool socks and went running outside in the snow and jumped in the lake which had frozen ice chunks everywhere! We ducked under the water and scrubbed our hair. We jumped out of the lake as quickly as we could and put our hats on our head. I'm so thankful no one had a picture of this :-)

3. I was the Co-Captain of our Pom Pom Squad/Dance line in highschool!

4. I Danced with Zig Ziglar on the beach in CanCun, Mexico. You can find the story in my blog.

5. I wanted to become a Cruise Director like Julie McCoy on the Love Boat! I am totally serious!

6. I love to dance to 80's music with my boys!!! We have fun jammin out together!

7. Since we live on a farm, we have way to many fly's in our house. The boys and I will go on fly hunts around the house and when we get one....we sing..."Another one bites the dust."

Okay, I am tagging:
He Won My Heart(Shannon), Cheryl, Melisa, Angie, Kristi, and anyone else that woud like to play along. Please let me know if you, did and I will link it to my blog so others can see!

2008-11-09T16:25:00.000-08:00

Celebrate!!!

Seven months ago my Dad had a heart attack. Many of the visitors to my blog know the whole story, but if you don't you can read about it here. Thankfully my Dad is still alive and doing remarkably well. My Dad's story is a miracle and we give all glory and praise to our Father in heaven.

In the days following my Dad's surgery, when we did not know if Dad would survive or not...we wondered about many things.

Would we have an opportunity to talk to our Dad about life, God, politics, or share a good joke? What would Dad's life be like if he managed to survive? Would he be able to enjoy fishing with his children or grandchildren? Would he be able to hunt again? Would he be able to watch his oldest grandson shoot his first deer?

The questions and thoughts raced through my mind until my head began to pound relentlessly. I soon realized, I needed to place everything into the capable hands of the Lord. I could not control the outcome or change what had happened. All I could do was trust the "One" who loved my Dad more than I could even comprehend.

Today I want to celebrate the second chance my Dad has been given. This week-end he is hunting with my brother, David, and his oldest grandson, Sidney. Dad is not able to shoot a gun this year and so he is helping, Sidney. I have heard from my Mom they are having a wonderful time. I am thankful they can all be together and I look forward to hearing the hunting stories. The Moorhead family is known to tell a few "tall tales" from time to time!

This summer we were able to go fishing with my Dad. As the boat pulled away from the dock...tears of joy filled my eyes. Jacob had fished with Grandpa before...but Matthew had never had the opportunity too. We had a wonderful time together and I will share some of the highlights of our trip at another time.

Leading up to the election, Dad and I had many political conversations. We were both convinced that John McCain would win the election....were were devestated when that did not happen. We will put our trust in the Lord.

We have had many opportunities to laugh, talk about God, and just enjoy wonderful conversations with each other.

Today, I give thanks for my Dad's life! I give thanks for my Mom...she has been Dad's biggest cheerleader. Their lives changed...but they are doing great. God has given us so many wonderful gifts to be thankful for each and every day.

2008-11-03T20:02:00.001-08:00

"The Lord's Prayer" by the Martins

2008-11-03T19:18:00.000-08:00

He leadeth me~ by the Martins

2008-11-03T18:09:00.000-08:00

In Christ Alone with scenes from Passion of the Christ.

2008-11-03T16:51:00.000-08:00

2008-11-01T18:30:00.000-07:00

Battle Hymn of the Republic

Get a load of these high school kids singing. At the conclusion listen to the high notes on the trumpet, played by a high school kid! One of the fathers recorded it, added some graphic enhancements to the recording, and posted it on the web. The song, of course, is the ' Battle Hymn Of The Republic.' Be prepared - it could send a few shivers up your spine. Click below:
http://www.greatdanepromilitary.com/Battle%20Hymn/index.htm

2008-10-31T07:27:00.000-07:00

Happy Reformation Day

Here I Stand
Luther's Protestant views were condemned as heretical by Pope Leo X in the bull Exsurge Domine in 1520. Consequently Luther was summoned to either renounce or reaffirm them at the Diet of Worms on 17 April 1521. When he appeared before the assembly, Johann von Eck, by then assistant to the Archbishop of Trier, acted as spokesman for Emperor Charles the Fifth. He presented Luther with a table filled with copies of his writings. Eck asked Luther if he still believed what these works taught. He requested time to think about his answer. Granted an extension, Luther prayed, consulted with friends and mediators and presented himself before the Diet the next day.

When the counselor put the same question to Luther the next day, the reformer apologized for the harsh tone of many of his writings, but said that he could not reject the majority of them or the teachings in them. Luther respectfully but boldly stated, "Unless I am convinced by proofs from Scriptures or by plain and clear reasons and arguments, I can and will not retract, for it is neither safe nor wise to do anything against conscience. Here I stand. I can do no other. God help me. Amen."

On May 25, the Emperor issued his Edict of Worms, declaring Martin Luther an outlaw.

2008-10-28T08:19:00.000-07:00

My friend, Cheryl, was kind enough to give me this award for my blog.

Thank you, Cheryl! I love your blog, too!

Here is what you need to do.

1. Slap this baby up on your blog. Don’t be shy.
2. Link to the giver.
3. Nominate up to seven other fab blogs.
4. Post links to those super blogs you are nominating.

For right now I will nominate two other blogs I like to read. Most of my time lately has been spent reading political blogs...but I won't be reading them as much once the election is over. So, I am nominating two blogs that I will always follow.

1. http://hewonmyheart.blogspot.com/

2. http://mylittleappleseeds.blogspot.com/

2008-07-09T03:15:00.000-07:00

Thanks Cheryl for thinking of me, even though I have not blogged for a long time.

What was I doing 10 years ago?I had just started my call at Grace Lutheran in DeWitt. They were in the process of getting ready for the National Youth Gathering in Atlanta….. There were 40 youth going and so I had the goal of making personal visits with them before the gathering. I did accomplish my goal and I managed to visit with other youth who were not able to go to the gathering.

At that time I was dating, Troy. So, most of my free time, was spent with him. Of course, with Troy being a very busy farmer, he didn’t have a lot of free time either.

For those of you did not know me back than, we became engaged at Christmastime that year! I love Troy more today, than I ever imagined possible!
What are 5 things on my to-do list for today?Tackle Mt. Washmore…it is a never ending battle!Work with Jacob on reading/writingClean (another never ending project)Have some fun with my boys!Go grocery shopping.Snacks I enjoy:My snacks have changed since I have given up wheat and gluten. If I can find chololate that I can have...that would be my absolute favorite snack! I have been enjoying more whole foods and that is a good thing!Things I would do if I were a billionaire:Pay off all debt and invest enough money to live on without having to work.Establish trusts for the charities of my choice.Pay for Jacob and Matthew’s college education and help out nieces and nephews too!Hire a maid (so they can take over my neverending tasks of cleaning/laundry)
Travel with world with Troy and the boys.
Buy my dream house here and also in MN!
Make sure my Mom and Dad have everything they need.Places I have lived: Minnesota: Internationational Falls, St. Paul and surrounding area, Glencoe. Illinois: Washington and Peoria. Iowa: DeWitt, Calamus, Grand Mound.Jobs I have had:Baby Sitter
City Clerks Office in International Falls/Secretary
Camp Counselor at Lutheran Island camp for two summers
Janitor at CSP
Security at CSP(that lasted about two weeks)
Student Union/Desk Clerk
Switchboard Operator at CSP
Daycare assistant teacher
Hostess at Applebees
Stock girl at Woolworths
Waitress at an icre-cream parlor
DCE
Respite Coordinator for the Children’s home in PeoriaSubstitute teacher.

I had many different jobs to help finance my college education!

I will tag Melisa and Shannon!

2008-03-09T15:27:00.000-07:00

Created by the Hand of God

Have you ever had your breathe taken away by something incredible? Have you ever had a moment where you could barely wrap your mind around an amazing picture, concept, or fact? Today I had a number of those moments at a CEW(Christian Experience Week-end) Renewal gathering. We had an opportunity to view a movie called "Indescribable".

How often do we sit in church and we hear the Genesis account of creation and we just listen and think...I've heard this before. Can you think back to when you were a child and were amazed by the wonder of it all when you were told, God created everything. Jacob and Matthew's response is WOW....how did He do that? Why did He do that? How big is God? And my favorite is God really loves us...doesn't He, Mom!

Today I was brought back too hearing and seeing as a Child? I didn't discover the fountain of youth....but I was reminded of a truth that I need to hear.

I am going to attempt to share some of those breath-taking moments with you. My prayer is that it will help you to see how precious you are to God. In this vast universe where the earth is a size of speck of dust, you matter to the King of all creation.

Earth is located in the Milky Way Galaxy...we are not in the center but on the outerskirts...the safest possible place for our Solar system to be. There are billions of stars in our Galaxy and if we were to count each one of them it would take us 2500 years. If you were to try and compare how big our solar system is to our galaxy it would be like placing a Quarter on the face of North America!

If you are feeling rather small and insignificant, please know you are not in God's eyes. A quote from the speaker brought tears to my eyes,"Nothing can shake you out of the hand of God." Whatever you might be going through right now in your life, the God of all creation cares about you and what happens to you personally. We cannot comprehend because we are not like God, we do not think like him, understand like him, reason like him, nor can we love like Him. We can go about each day rejoicing in His goodness, even when we are walking in the darkness.

There are many galaxies but there is one called the Whirlpool galaxy, I would like to share with you. There are two different pictures. The first picture shows the galaxy and the second shows the center of it.

This photo takes my breath away and it reminds me of this scripture passage.

1 O LORD, our Lord, How excellent is Your name in all the earth, Who have set Your glory above the heavens! 2 Out of the mouth of babes and nursing infants You have ordained strength, Because of Your enemies, That You may silence the enemy and the avenger. 3 When I consider Your heavens, the work of Your fingers, The moon and the stars, which You have ordained, 4 What is man that You are mindful of him, And the son of man that You visit him? 5 For You have made him a little lower than the angels, And You have crowned him with glory and honor. 6 You have made him to have dominion over the works of Your hands; You have put all things under his feet, 7 All sheep and oxen--Even the beasts of the field, 8 The birds of the air, And the fish of the sea That pass through the paths of the seas. 9 O LORD, our Lord, How excellent is Your name in all the earth!
Psalms 8:1-9 (NKJV)

2008-02-21T13:21:00.000-08:00

Simple Things

With all of the stress in our lives lately…I have decided to focus on the simple things. To enjoy each moment I have with Troy and the boys. I think sacred and holy moments happen all the time but are we paying attention so we do not miss them.

I would like to give you a glimpse into some gold-nugget seconds we have had over the past couple of days. I will just list them at random not in any order of importance but as they come to mind.

Last night at our Lenten service we sang one of my favorite hymns, “When I Survey the Wondrous Cross.” I glanced over and much to my delight Matthew had his hymnal open and was singing with much gusto and enthusiasm the words of the hymn a half a beat behind everyone else. Did it matter to his Mommy or to his Lord and Savior Jesus, who died on the cross he was singing about? I’m sure it brought a smile to his Savior’s face because it was sung from the very depths of his soul and somehow Matthew knew it was a holy moment of worship. I could hardly sing as the tears rushed to my eyes….Matthew, I pray you will always love Jesus with your whole heart…and long to worship Him at every opportunity.

My boys love the moon, the stars, the planets, and anything else to do with our solar system. We were studying about our solar system on the computer yesterday and there was a page we could print off so they could color the planets. Matthew came up and insisted…he needed to color the planets too. How many three year olds even know there are planets?

Last night there was a Lunar Eclipse and so when we came home we stood outside in the cold and looked at the shadow which covered about 3/4 of the moon. The boys stood in awe and wonder and wanted to know how God could make that happen.

I had one those nights where you fall exhausted into bed and even though it had only been a few minutes…I was almost asleep when Troy came into bed. I had enough energy to snuggle close to the love of my life and fall asleep in his arms. I pray that I will never take those special moments for granted.

When it was time to get up this morning…I did not want to crawl out of my nice, warm little love nest. But I have much to do today. I woke up at about 4:00 a.m. and did not really sleep much after that. I knew I would be tired and I felt cranky. I put on my w/o clothes and when I heard my sweet little cherub yell from his crib in a not so very sweet voice. Matthew was tired and he was not afraid to act it out. I spent ½ an hour soothing him when…all he wanted to do was cry and be mad at the world. During those trying moments he wrapped his arms around my neck and held tight and snuggled into my shoulder….I breathed in his sweet smell and kissed his chubby little cheeks.

I did exercise and it felt good to finish my w/o even though I did not want to do it. While I was working out I decided the boys and I would focus on the simple joys of life today. I needed to make cookies and although I knew it would be a mess a let them help make up the cookie batter. They found great delight in cracking eggs and sneaking chocolate chips on the sly.

After the first pan came out of the oven you could smell the heavenly scent of chocolate and peanut butter mixed to perfection. The boys and I sat down to a feast of warm cookies with warm gooey chocolate oozing out of them, while dipping them into our glasses of milk. It was a tasty treat which tantalized our taste buds!

I pray the Lord will fill your days with the simple things in life because in those you will find the most extraordinary moments!

2008-02-19T20:07:00.000-08:00

Happy B-day Mom!

My Mom is an amazing woman and I see the evidence of this with each passing year. Mom and Dad were married when she was 19 years old and she had all four of us kids by the time she was 24.

Dad worked a lot of 16’s so Mom could be at home with us. My Mom did not get her drivers license until she was 27, but at the time we only had one car…and so it didn’t make much of a difference in being able to go places. Our house had a great location…we could walk to school, church, the pool, the Hockey arena, the movie theatre, and pretty much any place we wanted to go.

We did not have a lot of money…but we never went hungry and we always had fun. Mom is one of the best money managers I have ever met…she can make a dollar stretch farther than anyone I know. When I realize how much money Dad only made over the years and how we survived is a miracle and a true testimony to God’s faithfulness.

Mom and Dad made sure all of went to the dentist twice a year (insurance did not cover), we all ended up with glasses, and some of us had braces. Mom and Dad sacrificed so many things so that we would not go without the basic essentials they felt were important for their children to have.

We never went on a major family trip and most of the fun we had growing up did not require a lot of money. But I do not feel like I was deprived. I have so many fond memories of my growing up years. We had our sibling squabbles..but we really did enjoy spending time with each other. All of the neighborhood kids liked to hang out at our house…because Mom always made them feel welcomed and special. She took the time to listen to their challenges too. One of my brothers’ friends called our house the cozy cottage. I think that explains why our friends were drawn there. We did not have the lastest gadgets or most expensive toys. Our house was filled with warmth and love. God was the center of our homelife. We had family devotions and it did not matter who was visiting they became a part of it. I would like to say that I didn’t feel apprehensive of what our friends might think…but many of them thought it was really cool that our family prayed together.

Mom gave us something far more valuable than anything money could buy…she gave us her time and her love. Mom never put herself before any of us…I can only imagine how tired she must have been at times. She poured herself into raising us kids, and I am so grateful and thankful for everything she did for me.

As I get older, I realize not everyone was as fortunate as I was to have a Mother like mine. My parents have been a gift from the Lord to me…they taught me about family, love, and most importantly to have faith in God.

My Mom is always there for me and I cherish the time I get to spend with her almost every day on the phone. It is hard to live so far away from my parents but through the wonder of the internet and great phone plans we are able to communicate a lot. My boys talk to Grandma and Grandpa a lot. My Mom find great joy in listening to Jacob’s corny jokes and she loves just listening to them life. She is showing them an important lesson about time…just spending time enjoying the simple moments with them.

I love you, Mom.

2008-02-12T20:32:00.000-08:00

My Valentine, my soul mate!

This week the world will celebrate Valentines Day. A day that is set apart for showering the one we love with romantic gifts and dinners and flowers. Over the past couple of years Troy and I have not had a lot of money for romantic gifts and dinners…but we have quickly discovered, while those things are nice, they are not required for romance.

I want to dedicate this writing to my soul-mate and my one true love, my husband Troy. There are times when I look at my handsome husband and my heart quickens with the love I have for him. I feel so very blessed to have him as my husband…and I thank the Lord for the gift I have been given.

Troy has a heart of gold and he loves deeply. His thoughts are never consumed about himself but about others. If you have him as a friend….you have a rare gift. Troy will always go above and beyond what is asked of him. If you need help, he will go above and beyond to help you. He serves his God, his family, and his church with a diligence that is beyond compare. If you compliment him, you will discover a humble man. His thought would be why would you not give you very best.

We have been blessed with a deep and abiding love. It does not change because of the circumstances of life…it remains consistent day in and day out. Our love is precious and special, but it is not because Troy and I have the corner market on romance. Nor can we be puffed with pride and think we are better than others.

Long ago, Troy and I promised each other we would base our marriage and life upon God’s word. We would ask God to be at the center of our life and help us through each day. Our wedding verse, which has become our marriage verse: “Commit thy way unto the Lord, trust also in Him and He shall bring it to pass.” Psalm 37:5

Troy and I are not marriage experts but we put our marriage into the Hands of the One who designed it.

Maybe you struggle with your marriage and you wonder what you might do to help make it better. Here are a few things that have made a huge difference in our marriage.

1. Never go to bed angry with each other. If you cannot work it out, agree to disagree and focus on the love you have for each other.
2. Pray with each other. If you pray together, it will bring you closer to each other and closer to God. It doesn’t have to be an elaborate prayer, just pray about what is going on in your life. We usually start with praise and thanksgiving, asking God to help and be with those who are sick, special blessings upon family and friends, and finally seeking guidance and wisdom from the Lord on whatever is going on in our daily lives.
3. Join a couples Bible Study or form one.
4. Finally, if there is an issue you cannot work out. Seek counseling from your Pastor or a trained counselor or Psychologist. There is nothing to be ashamed of and you will be amazed at you can learn about yourself and your spouse.

Happy Valentines Day Troy….I’ll save the really mushy stuff for later![:X][;)]

2008-02-03T18:57:00.000-08:00

Storms of life

In the midst of the storm have you ever wondered why the Lord has not stopped it? With tears streaming down your face you cry out to God over and over again? WHY? WHY? WHY?

Why do relationships have to broken? Why when you try with all of your heart to restore a conflict, the other person will not listen? Why would a Mother, turn her back on her child? Why would family members want to inflict pain upon us? Why are lies believed instead of the truth? Why Lord, have you not answered our whys?

I need to learn not to ask why? But to ask my Savior, what would you have me learn, from the storm. I have learned Jesus may not calm the storm, but He can calm me.

27 "Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. John 14:27 (NKJV)

2008-01-19T15:43:00.000-08:00

Forgiveness

Bitterness steadily begins to creep into your heart and you do not even take notice of it until one day it erupts into your thoughts and pours out of your mouth. You realize, the situation you thought you had under control, is far from it.

You begin to think…if only this person would change, go away, pick on someone else, or get the help they desperately need, your life would be so much better. As time goes by despair starts to settle in and you do not see any relief in sight. You have held your anger in for so long towards this person, it has now turned to depression.

You feel alone, wondering why God has not answered your prayers; does He not see the mess you are in?

You are getting ready to throw in the towel, and God catches your attention through His precious word. And if that is not enough, He uses the saints on earth and the words of the saints in heaven to really drive home the point over and over again.

If you are wondering, is she talking about herself? I am. Over the last week, I have been on a journey of learning more about forgiveness.

My Mom had a wonderful devotion to share with me about the story of Joseph and how he forgave his brothers. He could have destroyed them, but instead he forgave them. He realized through his long journey of becoming second in command in Egypt, that God used the horrendous circumstances his brothers had started in motion, for good. This Bible story always catches my attention; Joseph was betrayed by his own flesh and blood. I was reminded of the betrayal Troy and I have felt because of a family member. As part of the devotion it told the following story:

An old fable gives the account of a mighty eagle seeking revenge on another eagle. The revenging eagle flew down to a powerful archer and asked him to shoot the other eagle. The archer said, “I need wing feathers for my arrows for such a task.” “Pull out my feathers,” said the eagle. The archer did so, but his most powerful shots failed to hit the highflying enemy eagle. The vengeful eagle now discovered that he couldn’t fly. The archer laughed and shot him. Satan also laughs as our hateful attitude destroys us.

I realized my bitterness and anger was only destroying me. I was putting way to much energy into trying to work this all out. On my own. I was wasting what should have been given to my wonderful husband and my precious boys.

Have you ever thought about how at the middle of Sin, is I? Herein, was my biggest problem…I would pray and ask the Lord to take it away….I would quickly pull it back and let it continue to fester. I wanted to be in control.

Finally, I buried myself in God’s word….it begin to soak in and God showed me the truth. This relationship is broken and I (Michelle) cannot fix it. I have tried everything I can possibly think of…to repair it. I can do nothing. Only God can bring healing and restoration to relationships. I do not know how it will all work out and it really doesn’t matter, because I am resting in arms of the One who has conquered sin, death, and the devil.

“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30

2008-01-16T08:31:00.000-08:00

Two Things

Just for fun, at the prompting of my friend, Cheryl, Click on her name and check out her wonderful blog!

Two names you go by: Michelle and Mommy. (There are others, but I'm not telling!)

Two things you are wearing right now: Winnie the Pooh sweatshirt and a smile!

Two of your favorite things to do: Spend time with Troy and read.

Two things you want very badly: more time and more sleep.

Two favorite pets you have had/have: Tabby (farm cat) Maggie (our beautiful dog)

Two people you think will fill this out: Shannon (tag you are it!) Click on her name to check out her great blog too!

Two things you ate today: banana and a pink lady apple.

Two people you last talked to today: Jimella and my Mom.

Two things you're doing tomorrow: home school and enjoy my boys.

Two longest car rides: I'm going to use bus rides instead! St. Paul, MN to New Orleans and Peoria to San Antonio, TX

Two favorite holidays: Easter and Christmas

Two favorite beverages: Cappuccino's and Water!

Anyone else who wants to play, please consider yourself tagged!

2008-01-13T17:25:00.000-08:00

One of those Days

Did you ever have one of those days, where nothing seems to go right? Yesterday, I really struggled. The day started off ordinary enough…I was enjoying my children…and laughing at their antics.

I was trying to convince Matthew, to sit on the potty chair. And it appeared things were going well, until…he decided he would not poop for me. I knew he had to go…and was holding it in. I gave up trying to force the issue.

I was on the computer and I was trying to fill out one of those surveys, so I could earn some extra cash. Our hospital bills and we do not even have them all yet…are going to be astronomical. I was fervently….trying to fill out this survey about Vogue magazine. I had to laugh…as I would not use that word to describe my life or my wardrobe. They were asking me questions that I considered to be silly and certainly did not apply to me.

During this brief encounter with glamour and glitz…I became aware of Matthew running to the bathroom and talking about his pull-up. He came traipsing out of the bathroom with his pull-up off and inside out and hanging upside down…. I felt like I was in one those moments were you cannot move fast enough…I saw this glob of suspicious looking goo fall too the floor. Matthew knew I wanted the poo in the potty…and so he came up with the brilliant plan of doing his job in his pull-up and dumping the evidence in the potty. Let’s just say…. it ended up everywhere but where it was supposed to go.

As I was cleaning up the mess….I started to cry….I felt an overwhelming sadness about all of the stress we have been under with my health, the family member whose mentally ill, and financial stress. The boys quickly realized, Mommy was crying and they did not know what to do. The harder I tried to pull myself together…the faster the tears fell down my face and dripped off the end of my nose.

I assured the boys that Mommy was okay, and I was not mad at them. Jacob, surmised the situation and said, Mommy are you crying because we are taking the Christmas decorations down today. I tried not to laugh because he was being so thoughtful and considerate, “maybe a little”, I said. I could not tell him of all the things I was really heartsick over.

I called my Mom and I sobbed out my heart to her. My Mom has soothed my heart more times than I can count. She could have been a first class counselor to strangers….but she chose to be available to give wise council to her children. Thank you, Mom for always being there for me!

Troy came in and I fell to pieces all over again. He told me he was very worried and wondered if my thyroid problem was causing me to act this way. He all ready knows I’m an emotional person….but he said this was extreme. I felt a little better after to talking to him.

I didn’t feel hungry for lunch and so I thought I better go back to the survey and finish it up. As I looked at the women in those magazines….my thought was I have nothing in common with them. I want to read stories about real women, who have real lives.

I plodded through the survey rolling my eyes at some of the questions…wanting to ask…who cares! After all of that….I earned one dollar! I decided I would better use my time in studying to earn my MT degree because at the end of an hour….I would make more than a dollar.

My mind was starting to move into a more positive direction when I found out my Tuscan Olive Jar did not survive a crash earlier in the day when the boys were goofing around. Jacob told me the truth with big tears in his eyes…I felt a brief flash of anger…but as I looked into these big beautiful blue eyes filled with remorse…it broke my heart. I told him, I wasn’t angry and that he and Matthew are more important to me than the things I have in my house. The big crack which cannot be hidden makes the Jar look more antique!

As the day went on…I spent time talking to God and pouring out my heart to Him. I found an herbal supplement that appears to help level out my emotions and moods, so far.

By the end of the day, it had turned into: “This is the day, the Lord hath made. I shall rejoice and be glad in it.” Psalm 118:24

You see during my time with Lord…I heard His voice encourage me through the Word. The beautiful assurance from Isaiah 49 gave my heart peace: “I will never forget you my people, for I have carved you in the palm of my hand. I will never forget you; I will not leave you orphaned. I will never forget my own. Would a mother forget her baby, a woman a child within her womb? Yet, even if these forget…I will never forget my own.”

2008-01-11T06:53:00.000-08:00

I received this as an e-mail yesterday. It meant a lot to me and so I thought I would share it with my readers. It was one of those days...where the storms of life were getting me down. Why do we think we think we can fix our problems? Now, don't get me wrong...I don't think God is going to reach down and do my MT homework for me, homeschool Jacob when he doesn't want to work, or get Matthew to listen. I'm talking about those problems in life where there is not an easy answer. Such as a relationship that is broken...you have done everything you know how to do to make it right and it is still not enough. I'm talking about a relationship with a person who is mentally ill. In this case, the person will not admit or recognize they have a problem. It has broke our hearts many times and there is no end in sight.

God has been there with Troy and I, during every painful and gut wrenching moment and He will continue to do so. (I don't mention the name of this person, to protect them.)

For those of you who know the pain of a broken relationship, whatever the reason. Know that, Jesus is right there beside you...carrying you if necessary. He will never leave you or forsake you.

I hope you enjoy this story and find comfort in the scripture that I included at the end.

LORD, PROP US UP

Every time I am asked to pray, I think of the old deacon who always prayed, Lord, prop us up on our leanin' side.After hearing him pray that prayer many times, someone asked him why he prayed that prayer so fervently.

He answered, 'Well sir, you see, it's like this...I got an old barn out back.It's been there a long time, it's withstood a lot of weather, it's gone through a lot of storms, and it's stood for many years. It's still standing. But one day I noticed it was leaning to one side a bit.So I went and got some pine poles and propped it up on its leaning side so it wouldn't fall.

Then I got to thinking about that and how much I was like that old barn.I've been around a long time. I've withstood a lot of life's storms. I've withstood a lot of bad weather in life, I've withstood a lot of hard times, and I'm still standing too. But I find myself leaning to one side from time to time, so I like to ask the Lord to prop us up on our leaning side, cause I figure a lot of us get to leaning, at times.

Sometime we get to leaning toward anger, leaning toward bitterness,leaning toward hatred, leaning toward cussing, leaning toward a lot of things that we shouldn't. So we need to pray, 'Lord, prop us up on our leaning side, so we will stand straight and tall again, to glorify the Lord.

If you look closely at this picture of the barn…you will see the One who holds us up.

Romans 5:1-5

1Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we[a]have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we[b] rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. 3Not only so, but we[c] also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

2008-01-08T12:57:00.000-08:00

Be Still

Those of you who know me...know I have been plagued with some serious health problems over the past few months. My parathyroids decided they were not going to properly monitor the level of calcium in my blood and so their malfunction caused them to pull calcium from my bones and dump it into my blood. This can cause a whole series of medical problems: extreme fatigue, depression, heart problems, and kidney problems. I did not experience kidney issues but I dealt with the rest of them.

I had surgery on December 21, and what was supposed to be a simple procedure turned into a 4 long hour ordeal for my family members as they patiently waited for the surgeon to finish. Usually a person with hyperparathyroidism only has one bad parathyroid....I was unique...all four of mine were bad. They were of course even more challenging because they were not in the places they would normally be, hence the 4 hour surgery. The surgeon thankfully managed to salvage a 1/2 of one and I am extremely grateful.

I ended up spending the night in the hospital because of length of my surgery. The nurse would come in and check on me and take my pulse and my pressure. She kept commenting on how high they were and thought perhaps it was the after affects of my surgery.

In the week that followed, I noticed my high pulse rate. I remembered the high blood pressure and decided I better get it checked out. My blood pressure and pulse were to high and after an ER visit, a trip to the endocrinologist....I was put into the hospital. Where for about 6 hours they tried to get my heart rate to go down...at 178 beats a minute your heart does not work properly. They called in a cardiologist and moved me to ICU, so they could monitor my medication better.

They discovered my thyroid is inflamed (because of the sugery) and because it was irritated...it caused a thyroid storm. It was dumping way to many hormones into my blood stream and causing all of the heart problems.

Prior to my surgery, everyone kept thinking I was having thyroid problems because most thought my parathryoids were a part of my thryoid. Other than proximity, they have nothing in common. The irony is now everyone thinks my lack of parathyroids are causing these problems and it is my thyroid. I'm trying really hard to find some humor in the situation but today I cannot.

I am on a calcium channel blocker which makes me feel like I need a good nap. And my thyroid is causing me to feel anxious and at times irritable. I am tired and I long to feel normal again. I could have a pity party(anyone want to come?), but I know it will not solve anything.

Instead, I'm going to talk to my heavenly Father about it. He has promised rest of the weary and strength for the moment. In a response to one of my health updates a former professor and friend of mine, sent me a scripture prayer. He told me to use it in times of stress...or needing to calm down....or just spending time with the Lord. I would like to share it with you...it has helped me to calm down when I think my heart is racing more than it should...during those moments when I am troubled and discouraged and I do not know what to say or pray.

Focus on God's message to you after you pray each phrase:

Be still and know that I am God.

Be still and know that I am....

Be still and know

Be still

Be.....

This verse is from Psalm 46

May God grant you the peace that passes all understanding.

2008-01-01T10:49:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year!

Time flies! When I was a little girl, I remember impatiently waiting for the County fair to start. I complained to my Grandma how I could hardly wait and why were the days so long. My Grandma, spoke words of wisdom on that long ago day….I did not realize it at the time. She told me not to wish my life away and as I got older I would understand, that time does not stand still….it flies by so quickly, we wonder where it went.

I found so much truth….and now that I am a Mom, I would love to cling to these precious moments in time, because I know, all too quickly my boys will grow up. One of my goals this year is to not take my husband, boys, family, friends, health, or God for granted. I cannot make time stand still, but I can cherish each moment of life and not take it for granted.

This past year, I faced some major health challenges and it has caused to stop and take a look at my life. Because I felt so miserable, I was praying for each day to end as quickly as it began. I feel deep regret over moments lost this past year and I can never get them back…I can only move forward.

I also discovered this past week as I thought I was staring death in face…is I do not want live my life just biding time to go by because I do not feel well. There are some health issues I have no control over, but there are those I can control and I will start with those. You see, I thought I was having a heart attack they other night. Thankfully, my heart is in great condition, according to my cardiologist. Before hearing those words, I was thinking, “Michelle, this 70 plus pounds of fat has to go!” This is not helping your heart or any other aspect of your health.

I have not written in my blog for a long time….for various reasons. I want a fresh new start. This will be a great way to document the changes I hope to make this next year. My blog will change in someways…I will still write about devotional topics…but I also want to add stories about what is going on in my life about my health, my family, and I will also have entries about the 2008 political happenings. Now, I know I have many friends who share my political view points and there are other dear friends who do not. What I write about will be my opinions based on what I believe and my purpose is not to offend but to offer a discussion. You will be able to make comments on anything, I write. I always review my comments before I will post them….so I ask for there not be any vulgar language or bashing another persons belief. I believe we can have these discussions and remain friends. On some issues we will agree to disagree. I want to learn as much as I can about the political process and I want to search out the truth. So, I hope you will join me for what will prove to be an interesting year in the political arena.

I pray for God’s richest blessing upon you and your families in this year and always.

2006-10-01T19:24:00.000-07:00

My heart was trembling in agony and I was sobbing so hard that I could hardly talk. I was standing in the Minneapolis airport getting ready to say good-bye to my younger sister Sheila. It was the summer of 1993 and communism had recently fallen in Russia and my precious baby sister was flying over to Moscow to become a missionary. Even though Sheila is younger; her wisdom is far greater than mine. Sheila looked at me and told me that I needed to stop crying and pull myself together. She asked me what is the worst thing that could happen to me over in Moscow? I told her that she could die over there and than what would I do!

I will never forget her response to my fears. “Michelle, whether I live or I die, I will be with God. What more could you ask for?” I was humbled and I felt ashamed that I had not put my trust in God. I remembered the little pin that I was going to give Sheila as a farewell gift. It was a picture of God’s hand and resting in His palm was a young girl. It goes along with Scripture passage from Isaiah 49, “I will never forget you my people, I have carved you on the Palm of my hand. I will never forget you, I will not leave you orphaned, for you are my own. Would a mother forget her baby? Or a woman a child within her womb? Even if these forget I will not forget you because you are my own.” I had bought pins for myself and our other sister Jimella, to wear close to our hearts while Sheila was in Russia.

The time had come for our final hug and although the tears were streaming down my cheeks and dripping off the end of my nose; I felt a peace from deep within. It was not a peace that could come from me, it was the peace that passes all human understand, the peace that can only come from God. My heart ached as I knew it would be almost a year before we would see each other again; and this was long before e-mail and cheap phone rates. I was excited for Sheila and all of the people that I knew she would touch with God love and to be able to share His precious word with them.

To know Sheila is to love her. She has a wonderful sense of humor and she embraces life with exuberance and all that it has to offer. When we were growing up Sheila would always read joke books and after we were supposed to be sleeping we would hear her laugh with great enthusiasm over her jokes.

Sheila is very creative and it would always shine through in the plays that she was involved in at school. She was never content to just be one of the actors, she helped design and sew costumes and anything else that needed to be done. She was also involved with the Speech team and always did well. Sheila is very intelligent and she graduated in the top twenty in her class.

She loves the Lord with all of her heart and her dearest desire is to serve Him in all that she does. I admire her ability to “Teach the Faith” her passion for The Word always shines through.

Sheila would need all of these things to meet the challenges of living in a foreign country. Learning a difficult language, understand a new culture that did not have any conveniences, and being so isolated from family and friends. Sheila’s faith in God helped her meet each challenge and difficulty. Her letters home were so precious to all of us; and we were able to share in her adventure through the stories that she would share.

Sheila had been in Moscow for a few months and it was the beginning of October. That week-end I decided to go home to visit my parents. That night we were watching the news we saw the horror that was happening in Moscow; they were in a midst of a Civil War. We sat there in shock and disbelief; and we watched the events unfold right before our very eyes. The phone begin to ring with family and friends calling from all around the world asking if we had heard from Sheila. We had no way of getting a hold of her and so all we could do was pray and ask others to do the same. After the phone had quieted I shared with my parents the talk that I had with Sheila at the airport. I had given my mom a little statue of a little girl carved in God’s hand. We talked about how we knew that Sheila was with God no matter what happened and that He was holding her close to Him right now. We found comfort that Sheila was living with a Russian family and she had quickly become their adopted daughter and they were very protective of her.

As I went to sleep that night I held onto to two thoughts: Sheila is with God and He has her in the Palm of His hand. I awoke many times and I could feel God’s peace surrounding me and I prayed that it would surround and enfold Sheila and also my parents.

The next morning the phone rang; I’m not a track star but I made record time in running down the steps to get to the phone, we knew it had to be about Sheila. Hearing her voice on the other end of the phone brought tears and hearts that were grateful to hear her beautiful voice. She said she knew she had to call because we would all be worried sick; she shared that while it was bad it was not as terrible as the news stations were sharing with us. Her Russian family had forbidden her to go out and would not do so until it was once again safe in the streets of Moscow.

Sheila spent almost two years in Moscow and shared God’s love with many people. Her letters shared many of her adventures and the struggles that she discovered living in a foreign country.

Sheila is now happily married and is back in the States. I am so blessed to have her as my sister and my friend.

2006-09-10T20:06:00.000-07:00

WE WILL NEVER FORGET

Last week I saw the movie “World Trade Center.” I didn’t know if I was ready to relive the tragedy or not; but I wanted to see it. It is one of those movies that brings you right back to that moment in time and this time around I was right there at the WTC instead of watching it unfold on TV. It reaffirmed my belief that we need to stand strong in our war against terror.

We need to remember what happened on that day and how it changed our lives forever. I am so grateful and thankful for heroes that emerged that day who did not stop to think about themselves but so valiantly charged forward to help those in need. Many of those heroes lost their lives that day.

Today I want to honor all of the heroes of that day by sharing a writing that was read on Focus on the Family. Some of you may not remember John Wayne movies; but I remember them~ my Dad is a huge fan!

May God bless our US Military and their families, President Bush, and our beloved United States of America!

PEGGY NOONAN

Welcome Back, Duke

From the ashes of Sept. 11 arise the manly virtues. Friday, October 12, 2001 12:01 a.m. EDT

A few weeks ago I wrote a column called "God Is Back," about how, within a day of the events of Sept. 11, my city was awash in religious imagery--prayer cards, statues of saints. It all culminated, in a way, in the discovery of the steel-girder cross that emerged last week from the wreckage--unbent, unbroken, unmelted, perfectly proportioned and duly blessed by a Catholic friar on the request of the rescue workers, who seemed to see meaning in the cross's existence. So do I.

My son, a teenager, finds this hilarious, as does one of my best friends. They have teased me, to my delight, but I have told them, "Boys, this whole story is about good and evil, about the clash of good and evil." If you are of a certain cast of mind, it is of course meaningful that the face of the Evil One seemed to emerge with a roar from the furnace that was Tower One. You have seen the Associated Press photo, and the photos that followed: the evil face roared out of the building with an ugly howl--and then in a snap of the fingers it lost form and force and disappeared. If you are of a certain cast of mind it is of course meaningful that the cross, which to those of its faith is imperishable, did not disappear. It was not crushed by the millions of tons of concrete that crashed down upon it, did not melt in the furnace. It rose from the rubble, still there, intact.
For the ignorant, the superstitious and me (and maybe you), the face of the Evil One was revealed, and died; for the ignorant, the superstitious and me (and maybe you), the cross survived. This is how God speaks to us. He is saying, "I am." He is saying, "I am here." He is saying, "And the force of all the evil of all the world will not bury me."

I believe this quite literally. But then I am experiencing Sept. 11 not as a political event but as a spiritual event.

And, of course, a cultural one, which gets me to my topic.

It is not only that God is back, but that men are back. A certain style of manliness is once again being honored and celebrated in our country since Sept. 11. You might say it suddenly emerged from the rubble of the past quarter century, and emerged when a certain kind of man came forth to get our great country out of the fix it was in.

I am speaking of masculine men, men who push things and pull things and haul things and build things, men who charge up the stairs in a hundred pounds of gear and tell everyone else where to go to be safe. Men who are welders, who do construction, men who are cops and firemen. They are all of them, one way or another, the men who put the fire out, the men who are digging the rubble out, and the men who will build whatever takes its place.

And their style is back in style. We are experiencing a new respect for their old-fashioned masculinity, a new respect for physical courage, for strength and for the willingness to use both for the good of others.
You didn't have to be a fireman to be one of the manly men of Sept. 11. Those businessmen on flight 93, which was supposed to hit Washington, the businessmen who didn't live by their hands or their backs but who found out what was happening to their country, said goodbye to the people they loved, snapped the cell phone shut and said, "Let's roll." Those were tough men, the ones who forced that plane down in Pennsylvania. They were tough, brave guys.

Let me tell you when I first realized what I'm saying. On Friday, Sept. 14, I went with friends down to the staging area on the West Side Highway where all the trucks filled with guys coming off a 12-hour shift at ground zero would pass by. They were tough, rough men, the grunts of the city--construction workers and electrical workers and cops and emergency medical worker and firemen.

I joined a group that was just standing there as the truck convoys went by. And all we did was cheer. We all wanted to do some kind of volunteer work but there was nothing left to do, so we stood and cheered those who were doing. The trucks would go by and we'd cheer and wave and shout "God bless you!" and "We love you!" We waved flags and signs, clapped and threw kisses, and we meant it: We loved these men. And as the workers would go by--they would wave to us from their trucks and buses, and smile and nod--I realized that a lot of them were men who hadn't been applauded since the day they danced to their song with their bride at the wedding.

And suddenly I looked around me at all of us who were cheering. And saw who we were. Investment bankers! Orthodontists! Magazine editors! In my group, a lawyer, a columnist and a writer. We had been the kings and queens of the city, respected professional in a city that respects its professional class. And this night we were nobody. We were so useless, all we could do was applaud the somebodies, the workers who, unlike us, had not been applauded much in their lives.

And now they were saving our city.

I turned to my friend and said, "I have seen the grunts of New York become kings and queens of the City." I was so moved and, oddly I guess, grateful. Because they'd always been the people who ran the place, who kept it going, they'd just never been given their due. But now--"And the last shall be first"--we were making up for it.
It may seem that I am really talking about class--the professional classes have a new appreciation for the working class men of Lodi, N.J., or Astoria, Queens. But what I'm attempting to talk about is actual manliness, which often seems tied up with class issues, as they say, but isn't always by any means the same thing.
Here's what I'm trying to say: Once about 10 years ago there was a story--you might have read it in your local tabloid, or a supermarket tabloid like the National Enquirer--about an American man and woman who were on their honeymoon in Australia or New Zealand. They were swimming in the ocean, the water chest-high. From nowhere came a shark. The shark went straight for the woman, opened its jaws. Do you know what the man did? He punched the shark in the head. He punched it and punched it again. He did not do brilliant commentary on the shark, he did not share his sensitive feelings about the shark, he did not make wry observations about the shark, he punched the shark in the head. So the shark let go of his wife and went straight for him. And it killed him. The wife survived to tell the story of what her husband had done. He had tried to deck the shark. I told my friends: That's what a wonderful man is, a man who will try to deck the shark.
I don't know what the guy did for a living, but he had a very old-fashioned sense of what it is to be a man, and I think that sense is coming back into style because of who saved us on Sept. 11, and that is very good for our country.

Why? Well, manliness wins wars. Strength and guts plus brains and spirit wins wars. But also, you know what follows manliness? The gentleman. The return of manliness will bring a return of gentlemanliness, for a simple reason: masculine men are almost by definition gentlemen. Example: If you're a woman and you go to a faculty meeting at an Ivy League University you'll have to fight with a male intellectual for a chair, but I assure you that if you go to a Knights of Columbus Hall, the men inside (cops, firemen, insurance agents) will rise to offer you a seat. Because they are manly men, and gentlemen.

It is hard to be a man. I am certain of it; to be a man in this world is not easy. I know you are thinking, But it's not easy to be a woman, and you are so right. But women get to complain and make others feel bad about their plight. Men have to suck it up. Good men suck it up and remain good-natured, constructive and helpful; less-good men become the kind of men who are spoofed on "The Man Show"--babe-watching, dope-smoking nihilists. (Nihilism is not manly, it is the last refuge of sissies.)

I should discuss how manliness and its brother, gentlemanliness, went out of style. I know, because I was there. In fact, I may have done it. I remember exactly when: It was in the mid-'70s, and I was in my mid-20s, and a big, nice, middle-aged man got up from his seat to help me haul a big piece of luggage into the overhead luggage space on a plane. I was a feminist, and knew our rules and rants. "I can do it myself," I snapped.

It was important that he know women are strong. It was even more important, it turns out, that I know I was a jackass, but I didn't. I embarrassed a nice man who was attempting to help a lady. I wasn't lady enough to let him. I bet he never offered to help a lady again. I bet he became an intellectual, or a writer, and not a good man like a fireman or a businessman who says, "Let's roll."

But perhaps it wasn't just me. I was there in America, as a child, when John Wayne was a hero, and a symbol of American manliness. He was strong, and silent. And I was there in America when they killed John Wayne by a thousand cuts. A lot of people killed him--not only feminists but peaceniks, leftists, intellectuals, others. You could even say it was Woody Allen who did it, through laughter and an endearing admission of his own nervousness and fear. He made nervousness and fearfulness the admired style. He made not being able to deck the shark, but doing the funniest commentary on not decking the shark, seem . . . cool.
But when we killed John Wayne, you know who we were left with. We were left with John Wayne's friendly-antagonist sidekick in the old John Ford movies, Barry Fitzgerald. The small, nervous, gossiping neighborhood commentator Barry Fitzgerald, who wanted to talk about everything and do nothing.

This was not progress. It was not improvement.
I missed John Wayne.

But now I think . . . he's back. I think he returned on Sept. 11. I think he ran up the stairs, threw the kid over his back like a sack of potatoes, came back down and shoveled rubble. I think he's in Afghanistan now, saying, with his slow swagger and simmering silence, "Yer in a whole lotta trouble now, Osama-boy."
I think he's back in style. And none too soon.
Welcome back, Duke.

And once again: Thank you, men of Sept. 11.
Ms. Noonan is a contributing editor of The Wall Street Journal. Her new book, "When Character Was King: A Story of Ronald Reagan," will be published by Viking Penguin this fall. Her column appears Fridays.

2006-09-09T15:24:00.000-07:00

Jacob looks at me with his twinkling eyes and a smile that could melt the sternest hearts and tells me that he wants to dance. We are about to have lunch at “Fairyland Ballroom”. All the tables are placed around a beautiful wooden dance floor and the lights are twinkling inviting you to come and dance.

Jacob’s enthusiasm is bubbling over and he can hardly contain himself. He goes out onto the dance floor and there is no music playing; at least not the kind that adults can hear. Jacob was listening to the music that plays in his heart and in his soul. His dance was filled with pure unadulterated joy. Jacob will tell anyone within hearing distance “that he has moves”. His dance was a combination of gymnastic; ballet; freestyle; and some tap dancing moves. Mind you Jacob has never had a lesson in any of those. His dance was so exuberant that you just have to stop what you are doing and smile.

Even though Jacob was the only one on the dance floor; he was not embarrassed, only filled with delight that comes from dancing.

After the meal Jacob begged me to dance with him; he may not have feelings of awkwardness, but his Mommy did. Finally, I thought to myself I don’t have a good enough reason not to dance with my son. Of course, I didn’t go out into the middle of the dance floor but oh how we danced. I’m not sure how many more times my precious son will want to dance to the music of his soul with his Mommy but I wasn’t going to pass up this opportunity.

I happened to glance up and observe the people around us. Many of them were smiling and chucking a little but in their eyes was a longing. When was the last time that you truly danced with delight? When was the last time that you did anything out of character for the pure bliss of just being alive? When was the last time you listened to the music of your heart and your soul?

Don’t get stuck in a rut and lose the joy of all that life has to offer. I could have missed out that day by thinking that I would look foolish; but now I have a precious memory to cherish of dancing with Jacob. Can you hear the music playing……….

“I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.”
John 10:10 (NKJV)

2006-08-24T11:11:00.000-07:00

Father God enfold your heart with mine;
Give unto me the grace that is truly divine.

Lord, my heart is hurting like so many times before,
How can I go on and forgive once more.

Look to the Cross and look deep into the eyes of my Son,
The pain, the love, the despair that was His as I left him alone there to pay for your sins, that for you the Victory over life and death has been won.

Give me your pain, your deepest sorrows, the hurt that causes grief almost too much to bear; I will remove all of it, do not let anger and bitterness grow. In its place I will give you joy, hope, peace, and love~the world can offer nothing that can even compare.

Thank you Jesus, my struggling is done. Your hands are capable, you are all I need. When my heart is filled with you, we are one.

“My soul finds rest in God alone." Psalm 62:1

2006-08-07T15:36:00.000-07:00

“You have a growth on your left ovary the size of a tennis ball, and there is a smaller growth on your right ovary.” I looked at my Doctor and tried to comprehend what this would mean. Dr. Donnelly looked at me and said, “I know that this is a lot to take in and it is a shock to you. You have to have surgery, I do not think that it is ovarian cancer but at this point we do not know what it is…. You need to make some very important decisions in a short amount of time. We will have a pathologist in the operating room with us and they will be able to determine right away if this growth is cancerous or not. If it is cancer what do you want me to do? I know that you would like to have another child… I’m so sorry to be asking you all of these questions right now.”

I took a deep breath and asked God to give me strength. As the tears flowed down my face, I knew what the answer needed to be and what Troy would want me to say as well. “I need to think about Jacob first, not about some child I may or may not have. If it is cancer please remove everything and do what ever else you need to do, Dr. Donelly, I trust you.”

The surgery was only a week away and as I drove home I felt numb. I found Troy and I sobbed as I told him of the decisions that I had made. Troy supported every single one of them.

I struggled with the thought of what if it was cancer and what if I died. I’m not afraid of death because I know that I will be with the Lord. But my thoughts kept turning to Troy and to Jacob, I was selfish in my thinking, I didn’t want anyone to take my place. What if they would love that person more than me…? I couldn’t bear to think those thoughts. I wrestled with my mind and my emotions…. Until finally I was too exhausted to even think about it anymore. It was during that time that I clung to God’s Word and the message that I kept hearing over and over again in my heart. Michelle, I love Troy and Jacob more than you do and it will be all right. Let me carry your burdens for you, do not worry. After that I felt at peace… I still cried but I knew that God would take care of everything.

When I went into surgery the staff asked me why I was so quiet and I simply told them that I was praying. They let me be and I did not even have to count backwards I fell asleep praying and resting in my Savior’s arms.

When I awoke from surgery they told me right away that I did not have cancer but that they were not able to save my left ovary. We would have another chance at possibly having another baby of our very own.

Dr. Donnelly told us that we did not have much time to waste and that we needed to “get busy” trying to get pregnant again.

During surgery they discovered that I had endometriosis and that it would only be a matter of time before I might have to have surgery again.

It had been 11 months since my surgery and we were beginning to think that maybe it was time to start talking about adoption. In our hearts we grieved but we were excited about the possibility of adopting a little girl from Korea. It was close to Easter and we decided that we would look into what we needed to find out after the Holiday. On Good Friday I began to suspect that I might possibly be pregnant. I did not want to entertain the thought for to long because I had thought this before only to be disappointed. On Easter Sunday after we came home from church, I could no longer contain my curiosity. I took the test and my heart leapt for joy when it showed that I was pregnant. I was crying as I came down the steps and told Troy that by Christmas we would have a special present that would not be found under the Christmas tree. We knew that I needed to have a blood test taken to make sure and so they next day we anxiously awaited a phone call from the lab confirming what I knew in my heart to be true!!!! We had to make sure that everything was okay because I had a higher risk for a tubal pregnancy.

Joy began to blossom in my heart and I knew that this precious little one was a miracle from God. This was confirmed even more when I saw the Doctor for the first time… he told me that my chances of becoming pregnant had been very small. My Doctor is a Christian and we marveled at what God was able to accomplish as a precious gift.

On August 1, 2004 we had a level two ultra sound done because of my age. We had decided that we wanted to know the sex of our baby. I was hoping for a little girl and so as we were there and the Doctor helped us to discover what our baby was going to be…. There on the screen we saw clearly that we were going to have a little boy. I fell in love with his image and it did not matter to me that this was not a little girl. As we walked out of the room Troy and I both looked at each other and we knew that we wanted to name our little boy “Matthew Robert”. We had talked about names and after seeing our baby we knew that was the name he would be given.

On December 18, we drove to the hospital to start labor. It was a long tiring day and I had terrible back labor. I clung to God’s promises and repeated them over and over again as the waves of pain rolled across my back… and at times I could barely catch my breath as the pain just continued on an on. I could only stand to lie on my side but the nurses were concerned because every time that I did that Matthew’s heart rate would drop. Finally I consented to have an epidural because that was the only way that I could lay on my back to ensure that Matthew’s heart rate would not go down.

Everything moved fairly quickly after I received the epidural and Matthew came out into the world looking blue because the cord was wrapped around his arm. We held him for one moment and than they rushed him off to be under oxygen because his cry did not sound right. His pediatrician assured me over and over again that she felt that everything was going to be ok…. But my Mother’s heart was filled with concern over my precious little one.

Troy’s parents brought Jacob to see “Maffew Rabbit” for the first time. Jacob announced to anyone that would listen that was his baby in there. He was quite indignant that his baby was not wearing socks. We finally convinced him that it would be okay and that “his baby” was warm enough.

The nurses assured me that I could call and ask them how Matthew was doing during the night and depending on how busy they were I could come and in and see him. I awoke at 1:00 a.m. and called to ask if I could come and see him, they told me that I could help hold him as he was about to receive his first bath.

Holding him for the first time in my arms the tears fell unashamedly down my cheeks, our little miracle baby was finally here.

We discovered a couple days later at the University of Iowa Hospital that Matthew made the strider sound because his vocal chord was turned a little bit. During that time God kept reminding me that he love Matthew more than I could imagine and that we were all in God’s hands. I clung to God’s promises and felt the peace that can only come from Him.

God promises that He will never forget us. 15 "Can a woman forget her nursing child, And not have compassion on the son of her womb? Surely they may forget, Yet I will not forget you. 16 See, I have inscribed you on the palms of My hands. Isaiah 49:15-16 (NKJV)

2006-08-05T18:46:00.000-07:00

This past week we celebrate our 39th Birthday. Some of you might be curious as to why I made reference to “we” and “our”. You see I am blessed to have a twin sister, Jimella.

Growing up I never lacked of having a playmate and a best friend, because Jimella was always there with me. Of course I had two other siblings so there were not too many dull moments in the Moorhead household.

We are identical twins and so we did not have to try to hard to create confusion for our family and friends growing up. To this day our family has to listen closely to figure out which sister they are talking too.

Jimella is one of my best friends; we have had many adventures and journeys together through the years.

I’ve made up a little poem using Jimella’s name to describe how I see her:

J for Jewel yet to be discovered; I could search the world over and not find a gem as precious as her. Jimella is as rare as her name and truer friend would be difficult to find.

I is intelligent. She is an intellectual and loves to study and read. She is like sponge when it comes for soaking up knowledge and she is always seeking God’s wisdom for her life and her family.

M is for My Sister, my friend, my confidante, my counselor, my cheerleader, my encourager, and my “Mella”.

Eloquent in speaking, singing, teaching, and sharing God’s love with all that she meets.

Love of God, Family, friends, and her church.

Lovely inside and out. Jimella has an inner beauty that shines out and it is from knowing and loving the Lord with her whole heart.

Amazing in being a wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend.

Our relationship is not always perfect but at the end of the day we are blessed to know that God has given us a precious gift in each other.

“3 I thank my God in all my remembrance of you, 4 always in every prayer of mine for you all making my prayer with joy, 5 thankful for your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now. 6 And I am sure that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ. 7 It is right for me to feel thus about you all, because I hold you in my heart, for you are all partakers with me of grace, both in my imprisonment and in the defense and confirmation of the gospel. 8 For God is my witness, how I yearn for you all with the affection of Christ Jesus. 9 And it is my prayer that your love may abound more and more, with knowledge and all discernment, 10 so that you may approve what is excellent, and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, 11 filled with the fruits of righteousness which come through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.” Phil 1:3-11 (RSV)

2006-07-29T08:42:00.000-07:00

Our oldest son Jacob just turned five this month….. I look at him and I’m astonished to see that my little boy is now not so little anymore. It was only yesterday……. that he was beginning to walk and not toddle about, learning to sing his ABC’s, discovering numbers, wearing big boy underwear for the first time, saying I love you for the first time, always wanting to hold Mommies hand, holding his baby brother so carefully and calling him Maffew Rabbit (Matthew Robert), and other precious memories that I have stored in the part of my Mommy’s heart that will always belong to Jacob.

Yes, tears of love and joy are falling down my face. They are filled with memories of discovering that I was pregnant, of hearing his tiny heart beating for the first time, and the moment that we were able to first gaze upon that sweet little face. The awe and the wonder of realizing that God had taken a part of me and a part of Troy and created this amazing little boy that we are so blessed to have as our son.

Time flies on and on and it does not stop even though we want to grasp just a few more moments of each stage that they go through. And yet we know deep in our hearts that there is a natural progression of watching our little boy grow up.

Now I know why parents like to watch their children sleep, it’s because we want to commit every tiny detail to memory of our little angels.

When we brought Jacob home from the hospital, I quickly discovered he loved to have me sing to him. I made up a little song for him and when Matthew was born Jacob insisted that it become Matthew’s song too. Jacob’s heart is often generous when it comes to sharing love with is brother; maybe not so generous when it comes to sharing toys. I sing these words to the tune of, “Children of the Heavenly Father”. The last little verse is from the book, “I’ll Love You Forever”.

Mommy loves her little Jacob,
He’s her precious little angel,
He was sent from God above
As our precious gift of love.

I will love you forever
And I will like you for always
And as long as I’m living,
My baby you will be.

2006-07-17T08:51:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was my husband’s birthday and as a family we had a wonderful day together. As the moments slipped on by as they seem to do as I get older, I reflected on what a gift Troy has been to me. He is my soul mate and the love of my life.

I have shared earlier in a different writing that Troy and I share the same confirmation verse and that we used that verse for our wedding service. The Pastor a dear friend of ours also used the verse prior to our confirmation verse: “4 Delight yourself also in the LORD, And He shall give you the desires of your heart. 5 Commit your way to the LORD, Trust also in Him, And He shall bring it to pass.” Psalms 37:4-5 (NKJV)

During the wedding sermon our friend talked about delighting in each other and reminded us to focus on the joy because God had brought us together. Troy and I love to listen to our wedding sermon and it has been a great reminder of what we need to focus on in our marriage.

This past year Troy and I have heard distressing news of two different couples that we know of that they are either close to divorce or have all ready filed for divorce. We were so devastated and heart broken that we were unable to sleep; because we could not understand how this could happen. Both of these couples had strong Christ-centered marriages that we had both admired. We never dreamed that we would hear the unsettling news that their marriages were over.

The Devil does not like strong Christian marriages because it is a threat to all of his evil plans to destroy Christian homes and families. We have seen other marriages fall apart that once were so strong and we are left standing with an ache in our heart for our friends and their families.

Troy and I have come to the conclusion that we need to pray for God to protect our marriage from all of the distractions of life. We need to make sure that we take time to talk and to listen to each other. Not just to pray for each other but to pray together. ( I will never forget that when we found out that my Grandma was dying from cancer and it was during the fall, one of the busiest times for farmers. Troy would come in exhausted from a long hard day but he would always take the time to find out how Grandma was doing; and to take time to comfort me. It would have been so easy for him to go straight to sleep but he knew that I was hurting and wanted to encourage my heart.) That marriage is not about our own individual wants but is about what is best for both of us and our family. And finally it is only by focusing on Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior and making Him the focus and center of our life, that can make a marriage strong.

I was with some friends and we were discussing the book, “ The Power of a Praying Wife”. One of our friends spoke up and said she was disappointed at first to learn that the concept of the book is “it’s not about me.” We all laughed because we know that it is true. The only person that you can change is yourself.

I know there can be deep hurt and disappointments in marriage. And I will not pretend for one minute that I have all the answers to the problems and challenges of marriage.
However, I would like to share what Troy and I have learned that has been helpful and a blessing to our marriage. (These have been lessons learned from God.)

1. Do not go to bed angry at your spouse. “26 Be angry but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, 27 and give no opportunity to the devil. Eph 4:26-27 (RSV). From experience I know that you will not be able to sleep because the devil will use this opportunity to harden your heart even further against your spouse. You don’t need to solve everything that night but at the very least get to the point where you can go to bed and sleep peacefully.

2. Realize that there are problems beyond your ability to solve as a couple. When you get to this point seek counseling from a Pastor or a professional counselor. Troy and I have done this several times and we have not regretted it. Please understand that it does not make you a weak person to accept outside help.

3. Pray together. Troy and I do this before we go to sleep. For some this might be difficult and uncomfortable at first. It is a blessing to be able to pray together with your spouse.

4. Do not try and change each other. You can only change yourself.

5. Do not assume that the other person knows why you are upset. Even if you think that it is the most obvious thing in the whole world. Your spouse is not a mind reader.

6. No one can live up to our expectations. A wise friend once told me: Expectations lead to planned resentment.

7. Apologize and Forgive. In God’s eyes it doesn’t matter who was right or wrong he wants us to reconcile. When your forgive someone it doesn’t mean that you are saying that what they did was okay, you are releasing it and letting God take care of it. Do not let pride get in the way. And only God can truly help us to be able to do this.

I felt compelled to share about marriage today because it has been placed upon my heart to pray for all marriages. It has also been the topic of many Christian radio shows that I have listened to this past week.

In closing I would encourage each of you to pray daily for your marriage (if you are married), and the marriages of family and friends. And finally I will leave you to meditate on this portion of scripture: “5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not rely on your own insight. 6 In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.” Prov 3:5-6 (RSV)

2006-07-10T15:31:00.000-07:00

A few years ago I was surfing the internet and I happened to find an ad that talked about Zig Ziglar. Because of my love for Zig Ziglars’ writings and how he had impacted my life, I immediately clicked on the ad.

It turned out to be a business opportunity in where I would I become part of the Zig Ziglar Network. I had the opportunity to share his books and tapes and a special nutrition line with people.

I met some of the nicest people and I learned a lot about myself; and about building a business. I met Zig Ziglar several times for training and other events the company would have. I was always mesmerized by his speaking ability and his love for Jesus as his Lord and Savior. He seized every chance he had to share the message of God’s love with his audience and the people around him.

We had a contest that summer and if you earned enough points you could earn an all- expense trip to Cancun, Mexico. I was determined to earn that trip. I developed a plan to earn the points that I needed and I worked the plan. I was delighted to have earned the trip and I was so excited to go and spend time with the new friends that I had made.

Unfortunately, the trip was in October and for a farmer that is an impossible time to get away. I was disappointed that I would not be able to enjoy going to this exotic and romantic destination with Troy. Troy was very proud of me for earning the trip and wanted me to go even if he could not be there.

My twin sister Jimella had earned most of the trip and so we went together. The Omni resort was breathtaking and the food was divine. I loved visiting with the people that I had been working with over the phone and through the computer.

I had brought my book along so I could ask Zig Ziglar to sign it for me. And so I was waiting for the perfect opportunity to talk to him about it.

One of the nights we had a beach party and they had set up an extravagant meal for us on the beach. It was a beautiful night and moon’s reflection danced upon the water. The scent of the delectable food and the exquisite flowers they had everywhere filled the air. Jimella and I sat with our team and we laughed and shared our dreams with each other. There was a dance and so we all decided to go out and have some fun together. They started off the dance with some familiar favorites; and our group was have a great time together. They started the snowball dance where you would go and ask someone to dance and when the music stopped you would go and pick another partner from the group of people that were not dancing. I saw Zig standing with his wife and I decided that I would go and ask his wife’s permission to ask him to dance. Jean smiled and told me to go ahead and ask. I almost lost my nerve; here is this famous man who has spoken in front of millions of people all over the world. I went over and I told him that I had gotten permission from his lovely wife to ask him to dance. He smiled at me and took my hand and off we went to dance. Of course all of my friends gathered around and danced with him too. In all my dreams of someday meeting Zig Ziglar; I never once thought about dancing with him on the beach in Cancun.

The next morning I saw Zig and Jean eating breakfast. I had my book with me and so Jimella and I went over to talk to him. We both shared with him how his book had changed our lives and how we had enjoyed the course. I told him about winning the book and how I had always hoped to meet him so he could sign it for me. We talked for along time about faith in God, family and friends. It was a special moment; and I was struck by how humble this gracious couple was towards Jimella and I. They treated us like we were honored guests. The conversation flowed and I knew that it was because we all shared the same faith. We were connected by God’s love; a bond that cannot be broken or destroyed. Zig signed my book and he wrote, “Michelle, God loves you.” And he wrote down a scripture passage, John 14:6 “6 Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, and the truth, and the life: no one cometh unto the Father, but by me.” John 14:6 (ASV)

When we meet face- to- face with God’s love it changes us forever. God used Zig Ziglar’s writings to change my life as well as the love of my family and friends.

We all have struggles as we journey through this world and we need to bring them before God’s throne of mercy and grace. We need to leave them there and let God’s love heal us and mold us into the person that He has created us to be.

2006-06-30T08:54:00.000-07:00

As a young girl in grade school I was outgoing and generally made friends easily. The transition to Jr. High was painful and awkward for me. My sister and I were tall and we were very skinny and so that also meant that we were flat-chested as well. In 7th grade we also had braces and we had worn glasses for a couple of years. Everything seemed to change in relationship to boys and girls. Prior to 7th grade I had been friends with a lot of boys, we all hung out together on the play ground and had a great time. Of course there were the secret crushes but that is all that they were for us. We knew that we could not date until we were 16 years old.

I was not prepared for the endless tormenting that I received; I think I heard every flat chest joke that was ever invented. The cruelty of some of the students was almost unbearable at times and the actions of some of the boys would now be considered sexual harassment. At school I became withdrawn and I only really talked to my friends that I trusted. I felt ugly, stupid, clumsy, and inadequate most of the time. I really began to struggle with school and I had no desire even go.

Eventually I learned to survive and even joke about some of the teasing, though it hurt deep inside. My families love for me, my faith in God, and my friends became my anchor for me during that difficult time. At home and with my friends I was very talkative and outgoing but at school I became silent. I felt like I didn’t have anything important to say and I didn’t want to add anything else to endless list of what some of the kids teased me about.

In the spring of my sophomore year I had to take a speech class. I dreaded the thought of getting up in front of my peers and talking. But what they didn’t know and what I didn’t fully understand at that point was that I loved to talk and that it was as natural to me as breathing. Just ask my family….they could tell you a lot of stories.

My twin sister Jimella had done well in speech and of course I didn’t want her to surpass me in one of my favorite pass times.

I prepared for my first speech by rehearsing in front of a mirror over and over again. It was a good thing that we had two bathrooms in our house. I prayed and prayed and that God would give me the strength to be able to talk in front of everyone and that I would not mess up. I felt calm and peaceful and as I opened my mouth to talk it just flowed. I surprised myself, my classmates and the teacher with my ability to talk in front of people.

I even one best speech for the first round of speeches. I was thrilled and it was the extra confidence boost that I needed. The book that we studied for speech class was “See You at the Top” by Zig Ziglar. The book was about the power of positive thinking and I loved it. I would devour the chapters and eagerly write my next speech. For the first time in many years I was finally excelling in one of my classes. I could easily understand what Zig had to share with us and in time it became part of me.

At the end of quarter the class would always vote on who was the most positive person in the classroom. They would receive a copy of the book that we had been studying. I wanted to earn that title and I wanted that book. I prayed about it a lot… but some of my old fears came creeping back. I’m not good enough and I’m not one of the popular kids in school, this is beyond my reach. But then I would remember what God had to say about me and what I was learning about positive thinking from Zig Ziglar.

The big day finally arrived and because I had received the most awards for speaking and quite a few other ones I was an automatically put on the ballot. On the ballot was also one of the most popular boys in the whole school. I knew that I had done the best job I possibly could and that whatever happened I would be okay.

You cannot imagine the joy that I felt in my heart when I won the award and the class shouted and cheered. The boy that I had won against came and told me that he was glad that I had won and that he had voted for me because I deserved the award the most.

As I was presented that book I knew deep in my heart that God had helped me achieve this goal to show me that I was special and that I did matter. I also decided that someday I was going to meet Zig Ziglar and have him sign that book for me. My next writing I will share with you how I met Zig Ziglar….. The story will be entitled: "I danced with Zig!"

In closing I would like to share with your this scripture passage: "1 But now, thus says the LORD, who created you, O Jacob, And He who formed you, O Israel: "Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by your name; You are Mine. 2 When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; And through the rivers, they shall not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned, Nor shall the flame scorch you. 3 For I am the LORD your God, The Holy One of Israel, your Savior; I gave Egypt for your ransom, Ethiopia and Seba in your place. 4 Since you were precious in My sight, You have been honored, And I have loved you."
Isaiah 43:1-4 (NKJV)